There is no light at the end of this tunnel, folks. I went 3-4 last week. Darkness is closing in on me. I just keep going back to that 0-6 week and thinking, “man – if I could have that one back….I wouldn’t be so down.” Right here at Christmas, too – I’m feeling my reality slip away from me.
I just don’t know anything about American football. I might as well admit it. NO – no, I’ll never admit that I don’t know about ANYTHING. I’m Big Natural. I know about everything. This just means it’s time to stop digging my own grave…at least for now….and get back to doing what I do best: wasting other people’s money.
So, this can only mean one thing…..it’s time for a Hail Mary. I’m going to pick EVERY fucking football game this week. That’s the only way you get out of a gambling hole, by the way. You just bet bigger next week!
Big Natural’s Picks
NCAAF: Army +6 vs. Navy – Navy should win this game by a large margin, but they’re down two quarterbacks. This is a deeply-heated rivalry, so I think Army keeps it close.
NFL: Oakland +3 @ Kansas City – I’m buying in on the Raiders as the best team in the AFC right now. I know those of us who have been calling the Chiefs overrated this season are starting to sing a different tune, but I’m holding on for one more week.
NFL: Tennessee -1 vs. Denver – Believe it or not, I actually have faith that the Titans can pull this off. They’ll be able to run the ball and control the clock, generating enough pressure on Trevor Siemian to keep him from opening up the offense.
NFL: San Diego-Carolina, OVER 48.5 – This could easily turn into a shootout, but a 27-24 type of score is all you’d need to hit this one.
NFL: Houston +6 @ Indianapolis – Don’t overreact to the Colts manhandling of the Jets. Houston’s defense will keep this close.
NFL: Cleveland +6 vs. Cincinnati – I have a sneaky suspicion this could be the game the Browns win in 2016.
NFL: Buffalo-Pittsburgh, OVER 47 – Lots of offense in this one, folks.
NFL: Arizona +1 @ Miami – This is where Arizona makes its run. It started with Washington, and continues with Miami. The season’s on the line for the Cardinals.
NFL: Chicago-Detroit, UNDER 43.5 – The Lions are capable of scoring, but I think the Bears will be in this one in a defensive battle. Think 20-14 type of score.
NFL: Minnesota -3.5 @ Jacksonville – This one’s pretty easy, no?
NFL: New Orleans +2.5 @ Tampa Bay – Still not ready to jump on board with the Bucs yet. Drew Brees finds a way.
NFL: Washington -1 @ Philadelphia – This could end up being an elimination game for the Eagles, but I think that potent Redskins offense is going to be too much for the Philly D to handle.
NFL: San Francisco -2.5 vs. New York Jets – It’s obvious this Jets team doesn’t want to play anymore. These are two of the worst teams in the NFL, but I think the Niners take this one 21-17.
NFL: Seattle -3 @ Green Bay – The Seahawks clearly aren’t the same team as 2013-14, but they’re still in the hunt and should out-man the Packers.
NFL: Atlanta-Los Angeles, OVER 45 – The Falcons may hit the over regardless of whether the Rams score or not. I like Matt Ryan in a 35-20 type of game.
NFL: New York Giants +3 vs. Dallas – The Giants are the only team to defeat Dallas this season, and it’s because they match up pretty well against the Cowboys. Expect another close game, but I don’t see Dallas surviving again this week.
NFL: New England -7 vs. Baltimore – Not ready to buy in on Baltimore yet. Bill Belichick likes to exploit weaknesses, and the Ravens still have plenty. This is a spot they excel in.
Last Week: 3-4
On the Season: 47-56-3 (45.6%)
Stoney Keeley is the editor of the SoBros Network, Tennessee Titans Featured Analyst for Pro Football Spot, Contributor to FanSided’s Bama Hammer, and covers the WWE for WrestlingNews.co. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley, @PFSpot, @WrestlingNewsCo, @Bama_Hammer
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