Nashville Power Rankings: Week 2

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Alright, Nashville – we’re back for Week 2 of the SoBros Network’s Nashville Power Rankings. It’s Memorial Day weekend – I’m sure y’all are itching to get out of work to crack open a few brews and fire up the grill. But, stay safe out there. Don’t want any of you ending up in next week’s ‘Step Your Game Up’ section.

If you have a submission for this column, feel free to DM us on Facebook or Twitter, or shoot us an e-mail at thesobrosnetwork@gmail.com because we’re still too cheap to pay for e-mail hosting.

The Week in Review

Story of the Week: Credit to Fox 17 – Tennessee shelters are discounting dog and cat adoptions for Memorial Day weekend. Get out there and do yer jobs. Find some homes for these good boys and good girls……and the cats.

Blue Collar Badass of the Week: Everyone who actually went to work Tuesday morning. Man, it was a struggle, but a few people seemed willing to make the crawl into work the morning after the Nashville Predators clinched a berth in the Stanley Cup Final. You guys are the backbone of this city. The people who both understand what this win meant for Nashville, but still recognize that there’s work to do. Way to roll up your sleeves and GSD!

Shout Out: Fadi Boukaram – This dude traveled to all of the Lebanons in the United States. I’d like to personally apologize for Tennessee’s iteration of that city. Hope the smell of dog food from driving down I-40 isn’t still embedded in your car. Too bad you weren’t here for the county fair, bruh.

Honorary Nashvillian of the Week: Clarence S. Campbell. I know, the former NHL President died over 30 years ago, but since the beautiful trophy that bears his name now resides in Smashville, I figured we’d honor his memory. And, we all know there’s no more suiting an honor than being featured on a shitty comedy blog based out of Nashville…

SoBros Nashville Story of the Week: Keep celebrating the Preds heading to the Stanley Cup Final here.

Step Your Game Up

CMA Fest organizers – I don’t know who to really point the finger at here, but we’re looking at a potential Stanley Cup Final Game 6 happening in Nashville during the madness of CMA Fest. Rest assured that I will be avoiding Nashville at all cost for those several days.

The Clarksville Meat Stuffers – I never understood the concept of stuffing food against your bare skin with the desire to eat it later, but I guess desperate times call for desperate measures. I mean, I’m assuming you have to be pretty desperate to stuff your loins full of grocery store meat.

I know my body. I know what happens after the slightest bit of physical activity, much less with damn overalls on! No thanks. And, it’s not like these guys were incredibly discreet. Probably could’ve just grabbed a stack and ran off without much of a difference, and definitely a lot less sweat on those steaks. Credit to Fox 17:

Clarksville Police are asking for the public’s help in identifying serial shoplifters.

Police said the suspects are involved in shoplifting inside and outside city limits.

Photos in the gallery above were taken at Price Less IGA along Ft. Campbell Boulevard. Police said the men put several pounds of meat in their overalls and left withput paying.

#BeBetter, guys. Come on.

On to the Rankings

5. Captain Ryan Ellis – If you aren’t already following, you have to get on Twitter and follow @Ellis4Captain. I can’t even do this Nashville Predators parody account justice in this little blurb, it’s something you just have to do.

4. Paul Kuharsky – Kuharsky brought up an excellent point Tuesday morning on 104.5’s Wakeup Zone, and it’s one that needs to be reiterated at every chance. Nashville has to get over this little brother complex. I have to paraphrase here because I was listening in the car and couldn’t jot down PK’s quote, but it was something along the lines of, “so what if the rest of the nation isn’t talking about it? Just enjoy it here!”

He’s right – for far too long, Nashvillians have trotted out this awful take. “It’s not fair – the national media doesn’t cover Nashville. They don’t care about Nashville!” Why the hell does it matter??? I’m visiting New Jersey for the holiday and guess what – no one’s talking Preds up here! Why would they? And, what does it matter if they aren’t talking about Nashville in Los Angeles or Chicago? Why this perceived sleight of our city?!

As usual, PK callin’ it like he sees it.

3. The Stillery – As a seasoned veteran of the downtown Nashville lunch scene, I can honestly say that The Stillery down on 2nd Avenue is one of those ‘hidden-in-plain-sight’ type of treasures. There’s a lot of touristy spots down there, but The Stillery delivers a really good, unique menu – great burgers, good pizzas, great drinks. I start every meal there with an order of the jalapeno-bacon rangoons, and my go-to dish is, without a shadow of a doubt, the hot chicken mac-n-cheese:

You try this heaping helping of hearty comfort food and you’re down for the count. Goodbye productivity.

2. IKEA – Big, big, big, news coming out this week. Actually, this could classify as YUGE news. Courtesy of WKRN:

It’s happening. IKEA is coming to Nashville.

It will be located at the up-and-coming 300-acre development between Cane Ridge and Old Franklin roads.

The property was sold by the Lee Beaman family to Oldacre McDonald, which owns that large piece of Antioch property.

Crews are expected to break ground in early 2019 and the store will open in the summer of 2020.

I’m going to level with you guys. I’ve never stepped foot in an IKEA (is that how we’re supposed to type it, all caps? That’s how it’s branded, so I guess so…but I dont know. Anyway back to the journalism…), but the First Lady is fucking. pumped. Likewise, I’ve seen this story break on countless Facebook feeds and I’ve seen it re-tweeted a million times.

The city seems to be bursting at the seams with excitement for this store to open. Meanwhile, I’m just happy that this guy is now relevant again:

1. Colton Sissons – “Good teams find a way” has been our mantra for the last two weeks when we’re talkin’ Preds. They lost Kevin Fiala, Mike Fisher, and Ryan Johansen, but at this point in the NHL season, everyone is a little beat up. The championship teams find a way to win.

That’s largely due to guys rising to the occasion. On a night when the Preds didn’t play particularly well, Sissons stepped up and put a damn hat trick on the board.

’til next week, you stay classy, Nashville.

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. A strong advocate of GSD (get shit done) and #BeBetter, he’s down to talk Tennessee Titans and Alabama Crimson Tide football over a beer any day. Check him out covering the WWE for WrestlingNews.co. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley@WrestlingNewsCo

Like us on Facebook. Follow us on Twitter @SoBrosNetwork

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