.@RealLoganRyan talks me through a post-practice device he relies on. #Titans pic.twitter.com/BiB0aDpMiL
— Paul Kuharsky (@PaulKuharskyNFL) July 29, 2017
Tennessee Titans training camp kicked off over the weekend, and while most reputable sports writers in town were there to cover the action, your’s truly was sleeping after a red eye flight from San Francisco on Saturday. I had a little shopping to do yesterday, too…so…had to just miss out. Oh yeah, and for some odd reason, I don’t have press credentials yet…weird…it’s like no one wants to take our site seriously…
But, thankfully for the citizens of Nashville, I don’t have to be on the field to conduct the ground-breaking thorough research that SoBros Network is known for.
That’s why I’m writing this today. Because, while everyone is talking about Corey Davis’ standout performance yesterday, I’m looking for #scoops. I was catching up over the weekend and caught this video of Logan Ryan trying to convince Paul Kuharsky that a Bop-it is some sort of muscle stimulator.
Now, this is a short clip, so it’s hard to gather any sort of context here. I don’t know if maybe Kuharsky doesn’t realize that what Ryan is showing him is actually a children’s toy designed to improve motor skills. Or, it could be that Kuharsky is in on the gag, and both parties are yanking our collective chain.
One thing is for sure, though. That is definitely a Bop-it. Believe me, I played with one when I was a kid, and my girlfriend and I just bought her niece one for Christmas. Don’t worry, she loved it. What kid doesn’t love a Bop-it? Anyway, I don’t need any more credible of a source than my own two eyes. They’ve yet to fail me yet (except for that time I thought a fire hydrant was a cat and swerved off the road into a ditch. Just being transparent here).
I don’t think either man counted on one eagle-eyed Nashville journalist catching them in the act. Yet, here I am, and I’m calling bullshit. So many questions to ask – why is there a Bop-it in the Titans locker room? Why do these two guys think it’s funny to laugh in our faces? Nice try, gentlemen. But, I am obviously too smart for your shenanigans.
I have been awake for the past 24 hours trying to research these questions, but since I’ve given myself an 8AM deadline, I’m just going to submit what I have. Or, I’ll just never finish this story. One man can only give so much.
Actually, it’s worth noting here…I wasn’t completely sure that this was a Bop-it at first, but when Ryan said he paid nearly $500 for it, that’s when I knew this was all a sick joke. No reasonable man would pay $500 for a Bop-it.
All kidding aside, though, professional athletes live in a completely different world than you or I do.
First of all, Ryan claiming he’s old….my man is 26. I am five years older than him. And, he’s “getting old” so he has to rub his body down with this odd looking contraption after practice. Damn. Now, I feel old. But, he says they make a model to help your joints, too. This actually sounds kind of nice – maybe I’ll use our podcasting equipment budget and just buy myself one of these devices.
I may need one if I’m going to keep playing frisbee golf and running at a leisurely pace. I’m sure the rest of the team won’t mind that I’m not investing the money we make back into the business. Oh, wait! Ryan called it an investment….so, technically, it would be an investment, no?
Anyway, during my playing days in the Mt. Juliet Kickball League, if I needed any sort of muscle stimulation postgame, I would have to roll around in the gravel parking lot. True story. Five years from now, they’ll be passing these out at little league games, and I’ll be the old man in the bleachers talking about, “back in my day, we had to roll around in gravel to stimulate our muscles.” I just hope I have a kid by then or else that will be incredibly creepy.
Anyway, the future is now. Titan up.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. A strong advocate of GSD (get shit done) and #BeBetter, he’s down to talk Tennessee Titans and Alabama Crimson Tide football over a beer any day. Check him out covering the WWE for WrestlingNews.co. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley, @WrestlingNewsCo
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