I am not a fan of bike ramps. No sir, a bike ramp was made for a very specific purpose, and that is to ramp bikes. They’re made for experienced bike riders only, of which I am not. I’m pretty self-aware, so I know and understand my limitations deeply. I know that if I’m not familiar with something dangerous, the best bet is to probably not dive right into it. But, alas – that did not stop this middle aged lady from shying away from attempting to ramp up in her driveway.
As usual, here’s a link in case Instagram takes this video down.
Man, I’ve never seen a lady corpse like that. Like, that’s the Mance Warner school of selling shit – I thought she was dead. But, you can’t post anything on the Internet if somebody dies. That’s the rule, right? Shit, it’s our rule anyway. But, yeah – this was pretty well immediate corpsing. She hits the ground and the next thing you know, she’s a limp noodle, gliding across the ground.
I do feel bad for her, I really do, but at the same time, you gotta know that certain things just don’t mix.
I know that Stoney Keeley and big time bike jumps do not mix. Unless you’re a soccer mom that has spent her life doing BMX stunts, I don’t think soccer moms and bike ramps mix. Y’all, feel free to prove me wrong, but it’s hard to justify doing this.
Gotta #BeBetter next time, mom. At least this wasn’t like the video of the dude jumping off the bridge and through someone’s boat from yesterday. Those people were just sitting on the shore watching, but at least whoever was filming this leapt into action to help this poor lady.
Alright, that’s it – I’m done trying to entertain you guys with this lady’s face plant. We should all feel like assholes for laughing at this.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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