I’ve been pretty mad in my day. I dare say I’ve even gotten into a few scuffles. But, I don’t know that I’ve ever been so mad that I’ve even remotely considered tossing a firecracker at someone. Much less, at a gas station. Well, folks – today, we have a cautionary tale of why that might not be such a good idea.
An Oregon man faces criminal charges after police say he ignited and tossed a large firework during a parking lot spat and accidentally set four moving trucks on fire — as well as someone secretly siphoning gas from one of them.
This is like a Knives Out type of plot here (if you read the whole story). Just so many twists and turns, and I hope you were paying attention to every bit of it. But, I’d like to start off by asking how fucking psycho of a move is it to throw a firecracker at someone during a parking lot dispute to begin with?
What’s the current state of this guy’s mental health that he A) is carrying firecrackers around on him at all times -and- B) that he thought to pull one out and chuck it at this lady? Just seems like this guy probably needs to be locked up anyway.
Plus, this all happened at 5:45AM….who has the energy for something like that so early in the morning?!?! Unless you’re coming in from a night out and have been going the whole night, and even then, you’ve gotta be too drunk and/or dehydrated to executed a firecracker toss without blowing your own hand off.
What a weird confluence of events, though. Sparks fly and the embers land in the parking lot where some dude had been syphoning gas, are you kidding me? Is this how the catch the great Oregonian gas thief?!?!
Would the authorities even be on to him if not for this lunatic throwing fireworks at a lady?!?! The drama of this story has put an everlasting pit in my stomach.
Oregon – who knew?
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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Image courtesy of Erwan Hesry@erwanhesry on Unsplash!
