The global pandemic really is far-reaching in its scope. We know how it’s largely effected our day to day lives. But, it’s interesting to see how other facets of life are being touched by it. Take crime, for instance. Even criminals are having to adjust their routines – take a look at these fellas who decided to rob a Sheetz in Virginia with watermelons on their heads.
On Saturday, the Louisa Police Department in Virginia posted on their Facebook page asking whether anyone had seen two people wearing hollowed out watermelons on their heads who were suspected of stealing from a Sheetz.
Listen, people want to laugh at these guys, but I think this is incredibly noble of these dudes. These guys are just being considerate. Knowing there’s a shortage of PPE in the world today, these guys thought they would save the masks for the people who need them…the frontline health care workers, those susceptible to COVID-19, and politicians who want to demonstrate how to wear a mask in their press conferences.
Forget the ski masks – let’s hollow out watermelons and put ’em on our heads. That is innovation, folks. Probably the first thing that would come to any reasonable person’s mind when the question is posed….“hey, what could we use instead of a mask?”
It only makes sense. First, you get to eat the watermelon, and watermelon is absolutely delicious. Second, you still achieve the functionality of the mask by disguising your face. Third, the watermelon rind actually offers a level of protection that an ordinary mask wouldn’t, albeit forsaking a certain amount of mobility. Finally, you get a signature to attach to your robbery career – this is branding 101, folks.
These robbers are so thoughtful and intelligent.
Also, since Sheetz is embroiled in one of the most heated debates on the planet right now, I feel obligated to weigh in and say that I’ve never eaten anything from Sheetz. I am, however, a big Wawa guy. So, when the opportunity arises, I’ll have to try out Sheetz so I can develop an informed opinion on the matter.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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