In 1992, the SEC became the first major conference to host its own championship game. Coincidentally, the two teams that took to Legion Field in Birmingham, Alabama that year were the #2 Alabama Crimson Tide and the #12 Florida Gators.
Saturday marks the 24th installment of the SEC’s title game, as this year’s #2 Crimson Tide squares off against #18 Florida. Alabama is an 18-point favorite behind Heisman contending running back, Derrick Henry. Meanwhile, Jim McElwain parlayed his first year as a head coach in the SEC into a division title after serving as an assistant to Nick Saban for several seasons.
For Alabama, a win would cement a spot in the College Football Playoff. For Florida, that spot was likely taken from them last week, after suffering a nasty loss at the hands of in-state rival, Florida State. Still, the Gators will want the bragging rights and would love to be the catalyst for chaos amidst the College Football Playoff.
So, let’s plan to have some fun, root on our Tide/Gators, and poke fun at the old man party that has become the ‘SEC on CBS’ broadcast team.
The 2015 SEC Championship Drinking Game:
Take a Drink
Every time you shout “SHUT UP, GARY!” angrily at your television over something stupid Gary Danielson has said. Be cognizant of this one – you could be drunk by the end of the first quarter if you don’t keep your anger in check.
Every time Verne misdiagnoses an injury.
If the announcers crack a joke about a coke bottle in reference to Nick Saban’s recent press conference, take a drink. Chase it with what Bear Bryant would refer to as co’cola.
Every time Gary/Verne mentions how Jake Coker bided his time after losing the starting job to Blake Sims last season, take a drink.
If Will Grier’s suspension is mentioned. Also, take a shot of some steroids if you have them at the ready.
Every time Calvin Ridley is compared to Amari Cooper, take a drink.
If Vernon Hargreaves III is called a “Top 10 pick” in next year’s NFL draft.
If the word “overrated” is said with connection to the SEC, take a drink, then immediately denounce Colin Cowherd on Twitter.
If Missouri’s back-to-back SEC East crowns are mentioned, take a drink, and tip your cap to Gary Pinkle.
If Florida’s loss to Florida State is mentioned, perform the tomahawk chop with your arm, take a drink, and then apologize for offending people.
Every time you hear Verne’s signature “Oh, my!”
Take a Shot
If Demarcus Robinson is benched/demoted/suspended yet again, this time during the actual game.
If Gary sees a bone sticking out of a leg and calls it a pulled hamstring (nod to Kenyan Drake).
If a graphic is shown comparing Ridley to Cooper AND Julio Jones.
If Steve Spurrier is somehow mentioned at all during the broadcast. If Shirtless Steve Spurrier shows up, double down.
If Danny Wuerffel’s two SEC Championship MVP performances are mentioned.
Wild Cards
If, for some reason, the “Kick Six” is shown, you have to take six drinks.
If, for some reason, Tebow’s tearful press conference from 2008 is shown, you must take a shot, and perform your best imitation of a crying athlete. It doesn’t have to be a Tebow ’08 impression. Terrell Owens’ “that’s my quarterback” will suffice.
That’s it – enjoy the game. I’m calling Alabama 34, Florida 20.
Stoney Keeley is the editor of the SoBros Network, Tennessee Titans Featured Analyst for Pro Football Spot, and covers the WWE for WrestlingNews.co. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley, @PFSpot, @WrestlingNewsCo
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