Last night’s episode was a real backbreaker – for the first time since I can’t even remember, I gasped at my television as we witnessed one of Game of Thrones’ most beloved and interesting characters die and simultaneously learned the cause of his nature. R.I.P. Hodor – you had a good run. As far as the rest of the episode goes, we encountered three huge (YUGE) revelations. Let’s dive right in:
1. The Night’s King is about to tear down The Wall – Jon, Sansa, and company will be in Winterfell by the time this happens, but boy – I don’t feel too good for Edd right now. Why am I suggesting this? Because the magic that protected the Weirwood that housed Bloodraven was broken the moment the Night’s King touched Bran in the Greensight. Now, should Bran pass through The Wall, the magic that protects it may be broken as well. If that’s the case, bye-bye Wall.
If you’re wondering how it’s plausible for a woman to carry a cripple through harsh weather and outrun the White Walkers, you’re not alone. The thing is – I don’t think they are outrunning them. I think the Night’s King allowed them to escape. He killed Bloodraven, Bran and Meera fled, and he knows they’re probably going to head South – either directly to The Wall to reunite with Jon, or straight on to Winterfell to rest beneath the Weirwood there. Both outcomes are a win for the Night’s King should Bran travel to The Wall.
Sidenote: We just may meet Coldhands after all before season’s end. Boner alert.
2. Bran can alter the past/present/whatever – Not that it should be much of a surprise – young Ned Stark totally heard Bran at the Tower of Joy. Still, Bloodraven was quick to dismiss the possibility, so for all we knew, he was right. Now, we know he realized Bran wasn’t ready to experience the full extent of his powers and straight up lied to him. Time travel is a very tricky thing to write. I’m hoping they don’t venture too much further into it, and this was all done to teach Bran not to abuse this power.
3. The Greyjoys are going to build/deliver Dany’s ships – I honestly feel incredibly stupid for not connecting the dots here. One of the biggest questions of the entire story has been just how Dany is going to be able to get her army over to Westeros. Also, as I wrote last week, one of my biggest questions was just what the hell the Iron Islands meant to the grand scheme of things. Now we know. Whether Yara and Theon are heading to Dany now remains to be seen (think there’s an outside chance they head North – heading to Dany would be dangerous, knowing that would be the first place Euron seeks them out to murder them).
4. Can Arya just start being an assassin already? Seriously, tired of seeing her get her ass beat with a stick. We all know she’s going to turn into a badass – maybe she’s even going to kill Cersei! I’m tired of waiting – let’s start seeing things happen.
5. Happy to see the ladies get their requested male nudity – So many butts and boobs, but it hasn’t been entirely fair to the female demographic. Thankfully, HBO gave women all over the world just what they wanted: a closeup of some dangling testicles and an examination of penis warts. Definitely fair to women everywhere who wanted to see some hot male nudity – couldn’t have picked a better pair of balls to show. Totally the male equivalent of Emilia Clarke’s beauty.
6. Meera – Usually I enjoy venturing down the rabbit hole that is Game of Thrones fan theories, but don’t really put a lot of stock into them, but Meera killed one of the White Walker Lords (or whatever you want to call them), so shout-out to the small contingent of people who believe Meera is Jon Snow’s twin sister. Looks like you have a new bit of evidence to play around with.
7. Can we please STAHP killing direwolves? That’s all. I love ’em.
Character Power Rankings
5. Jorah Mormont – Negatives: your skin is turning to stone. Positives: you confessed your love to Dany, and she totally wanted you to go find a cure for a disease that hasn’t been cured in forever and then come back to her! That’s a win, right? In all seriousness, I’m not going to call Jorah Azor Ahai, but I think he’s going to have a nice, noble, fitting ending. He’s been one of the more underrated characters on the show.
4. Euron Greyjoy – Champion of the Kingsmoot! Huge win for the chubby pirate maniac, but his niece and nephew went off and stole all of his ships. That’s definitely going to knock him down a few pegs on the power rankings. How about him just responding like ‘no big deal – let’s just build an entire new fleet out of trees! We got this!’ as if it’s not really an issue at all?
3. Sansa Stark – She’s sneakily becoming Tyrion of the North. We’re starting to see how powerful her manipulative skills are becoming, and props for at least threatening Little Finger’s life. Show your strength, gurlfran.
2. Hodor – What a poor, brave soul…essentially living his entire life as fried-brain simpleton just to reach this point. Hodor was a true unheralded champion, but it’s hard for me to count death as a win, regardless of how noble it was.
1. The Night’s King – I’d love to give it to our boy, Hodor, but it just wouldn’t be right. If any character won this episode, it was the Night’s King. He managed to eliminate one of his biggest enemies, and could (should) be on his way to destroy The Wall and open up the world for the taking. A lot of things really went his way in this episode.
Winter is coming.
Stoney Keeley is the editor of the SoBros Network, Tennessee Titans Featured Analyst for Pro Football Spot, and covers the WWE for WrestlingNews.co. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley,@PFSpot, @WrestlingNewsCo
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