It’s a sad realization I’m faced with today, wrestling fans. But, I’m here to pen my thoughts regardless. Sunday’s Royal Rumble was a real eye opener for me.
Look at that! It’s like WWE was somehow able to rewind the clock to 1998. But, while Goldberg is still in phenomenal shape, it’s beginning to look like Mother Nature and Father Time are starting to tag team The Undertaker. The man who was once a paragon of fear is now riddled with wrinkles, a receding hairline, and a bit of a pot belly. The aura of invincibility is dead and gone.
Y’all, Taker had a bit of a pot belly and I can feel my childhood dying a bit. #RoyalRumble
— Stoney Keeley (@StoneyKeeley) January 30, 2017
Rumors are rumors – I get it. Still, some of the things being circulated this week are none too flattering. Reports suggest that Undertaker is in pretty bad shape after the Rumble match. How? He didn’t do too much outside of hobbling around throwing old soup bones. Did he even leave his feet other than when he was eliminated?
Some say Wrestlemania 33 is it for the Dead Man. He’ll have his match – likely against Roman Reigns – and then ride off into the sunset.
Some say the Rumble may have actually been his last match. I hope not. That’s not the way I envisioned Big Evil going out. I’ve even seen that he needs more surgery and will miss this year’s ‘Mania. I don’t know what to believe anymore.
But, there is one thing that just doesn’t lie: the eye test.
And, breaking news: Taker failed the eye test miserably at the Rumble.
Sure, he’s not too far removed from surgery. Maybe he wasn’t 100% in the match. Regardless, he looked slow and out of shape. Besides that, he’s 51 years old! His large body has taken a hell of a beating over the years. It’s the nature of the beast – eventually, your body is going to give out on you.
Hopefully, he recovers in time for Wrestlemania. If he does wrestle Reigns, at least we know he’ll have a young buck, and one hell of a worker, for a dance partner. Anything is better than last year’s Shane McMahon match.
Before Sunday, I wanted to see John Cena vs. Undertaker in a Retirement Match. That’s the biggest money match the WWE has up its sleeve right now. Cena would be looking to break Ric Flair’s championship record, while Undertaker would be trying to fight off the inevitable retirement.
Around November, I thought this was for sure the plan for Wrestlemania 33, but then Undertaker showed up on WWE programming, saying he was here to stay. Maybe it happens at Wrestlemania 34, but this definitely needs to happen at some point before Taker retires. In my opinion, this match is what needs to lead Undertaker into retirement.
Now, I’m just hoping he can walk down to the ring for a match.
His returns are a big deal. People seem to tune in when Taker is announced, but I wonder how long that can really produce ratings? How many more of us need to see the Dead Man in bad shape before his presence becomes a non-factor? How long before he doesn’t sell anymore? Is it really going to help the business?
There aren’t many guys who get to walk away from the business on top, with their health intact. I wanted Undertaker to be one of those guys. A real John Elway of wrestling. It doesn’t appear that’s going to be the case.
As long as he’s doing what he loves, and as long as the WWE keeps calling, good for him. I just hope he gets out before he’s forced out.
Stoney Keeley is the editor of the SoBros Network, Tennessee Titans Featured Analyst for Pro Football Spot, Contributor to FanSided’s Bama Hammer, and covers the WWE for WrestlingNews.co. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley, @PFSpot, @WrestlingNewsCo, @Bama_Hammer
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