Halloween 2017: The SoBros Costume Guide

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We do important work here at SoBros Network – it’s about helping the people. So, why waste any time? Let’s dive right in – it’s our annual Halloween costume guide!

The Official 2017 SoBros Halloween Costume Guide

10. Gordon Hayward – style-wise, this should be incredibly easy to pull off. But, if you’re really committed…well…you’re going to have to make your foot face the wrong way. Ouch. Too soon? Poor taste, I know. I apologize. Sorry.

9. Conor McGregor – Good luck finding a ‘fuck you’ suit this late in the game, but I think McGregor is a good option this year. It can either be ‘fuck you’ suit McGregor, or you can go fight style McGregor. The latter of which is going to be harder to pull off with all the tattoos, but you’ve still got time. Go buy some Sharpies.

8. Bob Corker – Everyone’s going to be Donald Trump. It’s just a given. Why don’t you try and spice it up and be a different politician? Since Corker’s retiring, you won’t have another chance to pay homage to his legacy.

7. Ketchup bottle the ketchup bottle costume was my go-to for a solid four years in a row, because I just generally don’t believe in spending money on a Halloween costume. Seems like a waste to me, because these things are expensive these days and you’re only going to wear it one night. But, that said, if you’re looking for cost-effective, this is a sure shot. $25 and you’re set for YEARS.

6. Mid-1990s Jeff Jarrett There really is no better Double J, and though the costume would probably be a sonofabitch to put together, I say it’s worth a shot. Just understand that anyone you encounter who isn’t a wrestling fan is probably going to look at you like, “WTF?”

5. Jeff Bridges – Not from any particular role…just….Jeff Bridges. He’s handsome, and you’d get to talk like him all night. Better get practicing.

4. The Night King – Night King so hot right now, right? LOL Good luck throwing this costume together in a week and a half. Just look at this motherfucker:

3. Bill Belichick – Personally, this is my favorite. You’d need to obtain a Motorola headset, but I don’t think that would be too difficult to procure. Then, you just slice the sleeves off a Patriots hoodie, dye your hair gray, maybe pull some of it out if your hair’s too chick, and talk to people in a deadpan monotone voice all night and you’re good. The ladies will love it.

2. Braun Strowman – Let’s face it, folks. Strowman is the hottest most unique looking wrestler on the planet. All you need is a black tank top and to shave half your head to pull this off. Making those patchwork camo pants could prove time-consuming, though.

1. Joel Osteen – with arm floaties. That’s it. “Nature Boy” Brandon Vick added this one, and I think it’s pretty golden. You could pull this off with a simple suit and tie. You may need a wig, and you’ll definitely have to go get your teeth whitened, maybe some botox. Good luck mastering the empty smile, though. Seriously, does Osteen ever stop smiling? It’s just his natural resting face. Anyway, this is our winner for the year, and should be one you can pull off with minimal effort.

Under two weeks, folks! Get it going!

(Editor’s note: if you came here in a panic trying to find a Halloween costume, I do apologize. For serious ideas, I recommend this tool called Google. AND, if you’re looking for some fun ideas on ways you can celebrate Halloween with that good doggo of yours, check this out).

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. A strong advocate of GSD (get shit done) and #BeBetter, he’s down to talk Tennessee Titans and Alabama Crimson Tide football over a beer any day. Check him out covering the WWE for WrestlingNews.co. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley@WrestlingNewsCo

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