WWE’s annual extravaganza centered around random household furniture touched base in Minneapolis, Minnesota. But, the Raw roster has been ravaged by some sort of viral infection that pulled Roman Reigns and Bray Wyatt off the card. So, we’re getting the return of Kurt Angle and A.J. Styles is wrestling Finn Balor, ’cause fuck it – why not? Let’s dig right in on these WWE TLC results and my match ratings.
Kickoff Match: Sasha Banks def. Alicia Banks – Thought this was a nice serviceable kickoff match, as has been the trend in recent months. Fox pinning Banks on the outside of the ring was a tad weird, but whatever – Fox is crazy. That’s literally her gimmick, so no harm, no foul. Banks gets the W with the Banks Statement as the announcers continue to tease Banks vs. Asuka. Rating: 6/10.
Asuka def. Emma – And, here we go. The debut of Asuka kicking off the show. I’m all in on heel Emma, and these two put a string of great matches together in NXT. The two definitely have good chemistry as two of the most charismatic personalities in women’s wrestling today. This is a tough spot to really deliver a great match in, as everyone watching knew how it was going to end, but I thought these two did well enough. Asuka wins with the Asuka Lock. Rating: 6.5/10.
Walk with Elias – Or, just throw produce at him. What a weird segment – do they just have shopping carts full of produce sitting around backstage? And, why would Jason Jordan think about rolling it out there and throwing it at someone? Strange.
Cedric Alexander & Rich Swann def. Jack Gallagher & Brian Kendrick – What a fun, stiff match. This seemed like it was intended to be a showcase of the Cruiserweights, but regardless, it served that purpose. I’m pretty sure Gallagher has a concussion, but oh well, the fans were entertained LOL. Alexander gets the pin after the Lumbar Check. Rating: 7/10.
Raw Women’s Championship: Alexa Bliss def. Mickie James – Bliss is the best heel in women’s wrestling today, and she’s putting on some quality matches to go with it. For me, it kind of felt like this program was always designed to get her over. But, given the circumstances, the match was fine. Rating: 7/10.
Cruiserweight Championship: Enzo Amore def. Kalisto – I don’t know what Enzo is anymore. But, regardless, this match just felt flat. At this point, we’re all just ready to see Balor-Styles and Kurt Angle’s return. Enzo gets the win with the…that….his finisher. Rating: 5/10.
Finn Balor def. A.J. Styles – Welp. I officially need to wipe off. Holy shit, what a bout. That was one fast-paced high-risk match. It makes perfect sense to have Styles lose here, after having to fly through the night to get to Minnesota. Balor wins with the Coup de Grace, and the two ‘too sweet’ each other as the collective Internet wrestling community orgasms. Rating: 8/10.
Jason Jordan def. Elias – I’m a big fan of good, solid midcard matches between good, solid midcard guys. That’s where these two are right now, and this match reminded me of a good old school European Championship match. It served as the palate cleanser between the two marquee matches. Though it was rather inconsequential, it was decent enough. Elias is immensely better on Raw than he was in NXT, and though Jordan has yet to click, he’s still talented. Jordan wins with a roll up. Fun little bout. Rating: 6/10.
TLC Match: Dean Ambrose, Kurt Angle, and Seth Rollins def. The Miz, Cesaro, Sheamus, Kane, and Braun Strowman – Angle comes out dressed in Shield attire, and it just felt like a Hail Mary on WWE’s part from the get-go. What a ridiculous visual!!! Who would have ever thought this would be happening? The match was a clusterfuck, and if you enjoyed it, more power to you. The guy writin’ the articles didn’t. “The Shield” gets the W after The Miz is hit with everyone’s finishers. Also, apparently, Braun Strowman is a face? Kane is the devil? I don’t know. I can’t even make sense of this. Hated it. Rating: 3/10.
Overall: I give the show a 5/10. A couple of outstanding bouts, Balor-Styles was excellent, and Bliss-James was good. Outside of that, this show was entirely forgettable. It felt like they weren’t prepared at all for this viral meningitis scare. Oh well, time to reboot and get ready for Survivor Series.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. A strong advocate of GSD (get shit done) and #BeBetter, he’s down to talk Tennessee Titans and Alabama Crimson Tide football over a beer any day. Check him out covering the WWE for WrestlingNews.co. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley, @WrestlingNewsCo
Buy our shirt. Like us on Facebook. Follow us on Twitter @SoBrosNetwork. Listen on SoundCloud. Watch on YouTube. Shop our store on Redbubble.
