Lord oh lord, February’s not even over and we got draft experts out here actin’ wild as hell. For those that missed the urgent breaking news, ESPN’s Mel Kiper, Jr., noted vampire, put out his second mock draft of the young offseason. And, it’s official – the man with the best hair in all of sports (except for Dana Holgorsen) has officially gone bat shit crazy.
First of all, he has Josh Allen going number one overall to the Cleveland Browns. The only thing justifying this prediction is that it’s the Cleveland Browns. They’re just as likely to draft Terry Bradshaw as they are Josh Allen. This is the team that in 2018 is just figuring out that you probably shouldn’t hire baseball people to run a football team. We can’t put anything past them.
But, there’s an awful lot of people out there who know an awful lot about football, and they’re laughing at the idea of Allen being the top pick. I mean, I don’t know why – a 56% completion percentage through the daunting Mountain West Conference schedule shouldn’t scare too many teams away, right?
It’s like Kiper saw this dude hit the crossbar from the 50 yard line on his knees and skyrocketed him to number one. “Well, that does it, Todd – Allen’s the best quarterback in this class. His accuracy from his knees and with no resistance whatsoever will translate well to the NFL” Just wait. If Baker Mayfield can pitch a can of beans into the open driver side window of a 2006 Nissan Altima, he’ll be propelled to the top.
But, then, our homeboy Mel done mocked USC running back Ronald Jones to the Tennessee Titans at #25.
SAY WAAAAAAAT?!
My man. We all think the Titans will address the running back position at some point (I like John Kelly). But, the first round? When this is probably as deep a running back class as has ever existed? I don’t actually know that that’s true….I need to be careful how I just spit out journalism like that. Point is – it’s a deep running back class, and the Titans don’t need one bad enough to warrant that selection.
Would I love if Jones became a Titan? Yes – I actually pushed for Jones to be in the Heisman conversation last Fall. But, to quote the great Chad Johnson, “DMNDS.”
That’s “don’t make no damn sense” for those of you not fans of Ochocinco.
Look – I don’t mind that our guy Mel Kiper has gone off the deep end. You do you, buddy. But, maybe we just need to reach out to his family and ask them to check on him or something.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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