Big news coming out of Memphis yesterday, as some homeboy got caught laying the wood to a big tub of mayonnaise. But, before I can defend my guy, who we will be calling “mayonnaise man,” I have to let you see this clip courtesy of our friends at WKRN first:
Buy me some peanuts and a tub of mayonnaise??? This man was enjoying A LOT of mayo at a @memphisredbirds game. pic.twitter.com/3AIRbgQGbm
— WKRN (@WKRN) June 18, 2019
Last I checked, this was still AMERICA.
Some of y’all in the comments section need to remember that. It is mayonnaise man’s American right to eat as much fucking mayonnaise as he wants. Now, that doesn’t make it appealing. I mean, I’m still kinda gagging as I type this. But, I also hate mayonnaise (except on fried chicken sandwiches). This dude can bathe in mayonnaise for all I care.
But, here’s my natural journalistic investigative mind working – did they kick him out because he wasn’t sitting in the right seat? Or, did they kick him out because he was eating a gallon of mayonnaise with a spoon?
There could be a much larger story and we’re just scratching the surface.
Ps. Tub of Mayonnaise Man sounds like the worst superhero ever.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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