Some big news from the analytics team at Uber, as the rideshare app that totally has a clean past and has never ever ever been in any hot water over a toxic culture or anything like that has announced their list of the most forgetful cities in the United States. This is based on how many riders end up leaving their shit in the Uber – stuff like phones, wallets, keys, etc.. I mean, we’ve all been there, right? Not me – I’m just trying to be relatable, but this is the exact reason I put all of my belongings into my front pockets when I go out to drink. Sorry, I just had to be honest there – I got caught up in the moment, and wanted to make sure no one felt bad for leaving their phone in an Uber. Anyway, our very own beloved Music City, the town I grew up in, and the town I call home – Nashville, TN – made the cut at #3.
This week Uber released its annual Lost & Found Index, ranking the most “forgetful” cities in the U.S. Nashville is listed as the 3rd most forgetful city, just behind Austin, Texas and Fort Myers, Florida.
Oh my, I just don’t know what to do with this revelation left at my doorstep. SHOCKING news! I mean, it’s not like Nashville has a reputation for being a big time party city or anything. The citizens of Nashville and its guests are well-known around the globe for being thoughtful, cognizant humans, especially on a Friday or Saturday night on Broadway. I can’t, for the life of me, think of a reason as to what could be causing people to leave their shit behind in an Uber! We have to take a good, long hard look at ourselves in the mirror, Nashville.
Real talk – jokes aside, this is the least surprising news I could read on a Monday afternoon. Then again, I am clairvoyant. So, it’s really hard to surprise me. I saw the ending of M. Night Shyamalan’s 2004 hit The Village before it happened…in case you wanted proof.
Now, remember this story the next time you and your friends go out on a bender down on Broadway and then hop in your Uber or Lyft. Just program your brain to do a dummy check every time you get in a car, and then that reflex will take over even if you’re on the verge of puking your guts out. Or don’t – actually, now that I’ve wasted 400 words on this, come to think of it, I don’t give a single fuck if you leave your phone in someone else’s car.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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