Tank the 401k Gambling Picks: 10/14/21

The gang's weekly American football betting picks are out.

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Welcome all degenerate gamblers back into our weekly American football betting column here on the SoBros Network, Tank the 401k. Call your bookie and empty those retirement accounts (actually, don’t really do that – this is just sarcasm. Our lawyers say we shouldn’t claim to be experts on anything because we’re not)! Each week, the SoBros team up to offer their five locks of the week – obviously, we’re not professionals here so take this advice with a grain of salt and don’t sue us if you piss all of your money away. That’s not our fault. Okay, I think we’re all set here – here are this week’s SoBros gambling picks.


Gambling. What a fucking roller coaster you are. 4-1 last week, which Stoney will probably give me credit for being like 2-3 or something. Anyway, I am back and going for a 5-0 sweep.

  • California Under 54 – Fuck I hate unders on a Thursday but it’s the pick. 
  • Mich St -4.5 – I like gambling on Indiana but not here. Michigan State makes a statement. Blow out city.
  • Ole Miss -2.5 – Trust Stan.
  • Oakland +3.5 – You better believe Renfrow takes over as coach and top receiver.
  • Jaguars +3.5 – Welcome to the Trevor Lawrence coming out party.

Steven’s Picks

Why am I always late to the party? Seriously need to get my priorities in line because everyone is waiting on the edge of their seat every Thursday waiting to see my slightly below average picks. Back-to-back weeks of 3-2 has me starting to feel good about things. Winning is winning no matter what. This week I’m feeling like 5-0 is a strong possibility. Take it for what it is.

  • Dallas -3.5
  • Tampa Bay -6.5
  • Nebraska -4
  • Alabama-17
  • Oklahoma St +4.5

Stoney’s Picks

  • Bucs -6.5 – Don’t overthink it. If you can still get the Bucs at -6.5, you take that bet. Brady is on fire.
  • LSU +11.5 – I just don’t see what everyone else sees in Florida. I think home field still means something, and even though LSU’s record is ass, they’re still perfectly capable of winning this game at home.
  • Texas -4.5 – I love Oklahoma State’s story so far this season…that defense has been solid, but look at who they’ve played. They’re going to be tested like they haven’t been tested before by that explosive Texas offense, and I just don’t see ’em being able to pull this one off.
  • Kentucky @ Georgia, UNDER 44.5 – I hate taking unders in college football, and we’re towing a dangerous, dangerous line here with a number that’s already low. But, as usual, I’m going to make my case and y’all can figure out what to do with it. These are two really good defenses playing in a game that could end up determining the SEC East. Both teams will want to stick with their bread and butter, so in the best case scenario for Kentucky, they’re successful in that regard, and this game turns into another Georgia-Clemson type of game. Worst case scenario, they have no success against that Georgia defense, and the Bulldogs will be content to run at will and ride this one out without much variation from the formula that’s put them on top of the college football world. I could see this being a 20-10 type of game or a 35-6 type of game. Either way favoring the Bulldogs and favoring that under.
  • Baylor -6.5 – They’re at home against a BYU team that was exposed a bit by Boise State. Baylor has a real shot at making some noise in the Big 12, and lo and behold, Baylor’s offensive coordinator and offensive line coach served as BYU’s offensive coordinator and offensive line coach a season ago. Baylor knows what’s coming. When the head coach at BYU is saying things like “they know our personnel, they know our scheme,” I don’t think it bodes well for the Cougars.


  • Stan last week: (4-1)
  • Stan’s 2021 W-L: (16-13-1) – 55.2%
  • Steven last week: (2-2-1)
  • Steven’s 2021 W-L: (10-16-4) – 38.5%
  • Stoney last week: (3-2)
  • Stoney’s 2021 W-L: (14-16) – 46.7%
  • SoBros last week: (9-5-1) – 64.3%
  • SoBros 2021 W-L: (40-45-5) – 47.1%

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD, #BeBetter, and ‘Minds right, asses tight.’ “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, Yankee Candle, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley

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