Tank the 401k Gambling Picks: 11/18/21

It's common knowledge that the only way to dig yourself out of a hole is to keep digging!

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Welcome all degenerate gamblers back into our weekly American football betting column here on the SoBros Network, Tank the 401k. Call your bookie and empty those retirement accounts (actually, don’t really do that – this is just sarcasm. Our lawyers say we shouldn’t claim to be experts on anything because we’re not)! Each week, the SoBros team up to offer their five locks of the week – obviously, we’re not professionals here so take this advice with a grain of salt and don’t sue us if you piss all of your money away. That’s not our fault. Okay, I think we’re all set here – here are this week’s SoBros gambling picks.

STAN’S PICKS

I think I have figured out why I keep having small loss weeks. I think in 2 or 3 of the games I have the right game just am picking the wrong team. I also had my second push of the year. We fix that now….

Duke +20. Do it for your drunk driving basketball team.
Clemson/Wake Forest, under 56.5. Clemson stinks but their defense is competitive.
Oklahoma -3.5. Home game. Statement game.
Arizona -2.5. Are the Seahawks done?
Carolina -3.5 “immmmm baaaaaack”

STEVEN’S PICKS

Again, I have no right whatsoever to tell you why I believe in these picks because I’m not 100% that I do. I’m going to keep throwing the reverse psychology out there until it hits.

Titans -10
San Diego St. -10.5
Michigan St. +19
Notre Dame -17
Alabama-20.5

STONEY’S PICKS

I don’t want to play technicalities, but technically, I did NOT have a losing week last week because I did add into last week’s column that I was in on Pitt -6.5 like the boys were, and that would’ve gotten me to 3-3. But, I’m going to play by the rules and acknowledge that I had another losing weekend last weekend. FUCK. We HAVE to get right – so, it’s like I always say….common sense dictates that the only way to dig yourself out of a hole is to keep digging until you hit the other side. LFG.

Cincinnati -10.5 – How many good defenses has SMU played this season? How many good secondaries have they played? The Bearcats will be the best pass defense that SMU has played all season long, and for a team that likes to throw it a hundred times each game…that’s kind of important to think about. I could see this being the game that we finally see the Bearcats just grip it and rip it and mow this overvalued SMU team down where it stands.
Utah -3.5 – I’ve made my money betting Oregon all season long, but playing their brand of football and covering against Washington and Washington State is one thing. Going on the road to a hostile environment in Utah against the best offense they’ll have faced since Ohio State is another. I like Utah because of the balance they have on offense, and the home field advantage. I think they’ll be content to make Anthony Brown pass the ball to beat them, and I’m not sure that’s a recipe for success for this program.
Utah State -4.5 – We’re doubling down on Utah teams this week! Three dominant wins in a row for the Aggies who are averaging 33.4 points per game this season. What’s Wyoming’s best win of the season? Northern Illinois? Colorado State? I don’t trust the Cowboys to go on the road and beat this Aggies team right now. It should be relatively easy for the home team.
Chiefs -2.5 – They’re getting things right now, and the Cowboys are not the same Super Bowl contender on the road as they are at home. Their four road games this season have been decided by an average of 3.75 points. Now, they’ve gone 3-1 in those four games, but Kansas City is a tough place to play. I like the Chiefs to cover this one.
Packers -2.5 – I love these 2.5-point lines in the NFL. For me, this one’s about the Packers defense really coming on in the last few weeks. I’m not ready to buy in on the Vikings yet.

SEASON STATS

Stan last week: (1-3-1)
Stan’s 2021 W-L: (30-23-2) – 56.6%
Steven last week: (1-4)
Steven’s 2021 W-L: (20-31-4) – 39.2%
Stoney last week: (2-3)
Stoney’s 2021 W-L: (29-26) – 52.7%
SoBros last week: (4-10-1) – 28.5%
SoBros 2021 W-L: (79-80-6) – 49.6%

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD, #BeBetter, and ‘Minds right, asses tight.’ “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, Yankee Candle, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley