Black Monday has come and gone as the NFL closed the book on another season, and at the time of this writing, seven franchises have closed the book on their head coach from 2021. That’s how it goes in the NFL – it is cold as hell out on these streets. If you don’t produce, you’re out. So, while 14 teams are gearing up for the postseason, the rest of the league is in full-on evaluation mode, and the coaching carousel has officially begun. I’m sure I’ll get around to ranking potential head coaching candidates next week. But, for now, I’m going to offer up my thoughts on how I see these vacancies, and no, this is not just an excuse for me to twist the knife in Jacksonville/Houston fans again.
Ranking the NFL Coaching Vacancies
8. New York Giants – Man, the Giants have a long way to go in terms of building a winning culture. Joe Judge had people fighting each other in camp, and I can’t help but wonder if that kind of ingrained toxicity is going to make it harder to build the Giants back up into an exemplary NFL franchise. In other words, what’s harder? Replenishing a depleted roster or changing the vibe in a locker room? Whoever takes the head coach and GM roles will have to do both.
7. Houston Texans – Come on now, damn it – I just wrote about how I thought the Texans should take a longer look at David Culley and Davis Mills. I guess Culley really was just brought in to be a steadying presence in a lost season. Bubble gum sellers in Houston must be livid. For all the “good” that he did, that roster is still A LONG way’s away. In other words, there is a shit ton of work to do. Maybe if they can get Brian Flores, they might have a shot at keeping Deshaun Watson (part of why Watson wanted to go to Miami was Flores), but there’s still plenty of rebuilding to do.
6. Jacksonville Jaguars – I know that opinions have swayed on Trevor Lawrence in the scouting community, but with all the talent he has, I think it’s way too early to start showing concern. He has generational talent, and still has plenty of time to develop. There are some intriguing pieces there on offense, but it’s the defense that should have prospective coaches excited. It was better than people gave it credit for. Jacksonville was a downright shit show in 2021, but from a roster perspective, they’re closer than people think in terms of raw talent. They just need someone who will actually put it all together instead of sticking their thumbs in hineys at sports bars.
5. Miami Dolphins – There’s always one surprise firing in there somewhere, and this year, it was the Dolphins electing to move on from Flores after he made that team a playoff contender with an offense that needed a ton of hand-holding. Good luck getting the same production out of that unit without Flores. The defense can carry this team and that’s what makes the Dolphins attractive right now, but outside of Jaylen Waddle, there’s a lot to sort out on offense.
4. Chicago Bears – The argument for having them higher on the list of NFL coaching vacancies is that you have a readymade roster that has been to the playoffs in two of the three seasons prior to 2021, but let’s be real, that 2020 team was fortunate to make the final cut. The Bears have some pieces on both sides of the ball to build around, but rebuilding with a new coach and GM is the task at hand. That’s how I’m splitting the hairs here on my list – from a talent perspective, I don’t think it’ll be as readymade as some folks are suggesting.
3. Las Vegas Raiders – The Raiders have to take a good long look at Rich Bisaccia, right?! Technically, this job is open as the man still has the interim tag slapped across his nameplate. But, if you look at the job he’s done in navigating a season that has been tumultuous to say the least, he sure seems like a logical choice to get a run with the team. Now, how much of this run has been Bisaccia and how much has it just been a team coming together because of the adversity? That’s for the Raiders to figure out. Regardless, any coach would be inheriting a playoff team with a solid foundation.
2. Minnesota Vikings – The Vikings were due for a change in leadership after floundering around on the cusp of playoff contention without any real signs of progress as a franchise. Kirk Cousins is a guy that you can win with (at least until his contract is up), and that roster is loaded with talent. This is a job that someone with a fresh perspective that knows how to leverage all that talent in the modern NFL will be able to have instant success in.
1. Denver Broncos – I love this Broncos roster. This team’s offensive ineptitude wasted a top five caliber defense in 2021, and I say this not to twist the knife into Broncos fans, but to illustrate just how close this team is to being a playoff contender. It’s a shitty year to be in need of an instant upgrade at quarterback, but it’s the one area of this team that I look at and say, “damn, if you can get that one right, you’re going to be good right away.”
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Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD, #BeBetter, and ‘Minds right, asses tight.’ “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, Yankee Candle, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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