Have You Ever Been so Mad at a Golf Game That You Bit Your Buddy’s Nose Off?

Remind me not to play golf with this guy!

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I feel like we have a “guy bit off another guy’s nose” story here on the site somewhere. Maybe I’ve just been doing this so long that it’s all starting to run together. I don’t know. I am pretty jaded by stuff like this, and any time you get someone biting another person over something silly, it’s like a fast track to getting on SoBros Network. Regardless, this is a pretty wild story, and at the very least, I figured it is my duty, honor, and privilege to be able to share shit like this with you guys. Have you ever been so heated over a golf game that you bit your opponent’s nose off in the parking lot of a casino and then hopped in your Tesla to flee the scene?

Courtesy of the Tampa Bay Times:

An argument between two men over a golf game led one golfer to bite the nose off the other in the parking lot of a casino, police said.

Hold up. Hold up. This man bit another man’s nose off and then just hopped in the Tesla to drive off before ultimately turning himself in hours later. What happened in that car ride? I mean, you can’t tell me that you’re insane enough to bite someone’s nose off, but NOT insane enough to run from the police! The Tampa Bay Times didn’t give us too many details, which is fair if all of the details aren’t out. Don’t get me wrong – but I need an update.

I could see it going one of two ways – one…drugs. In stories like these, there’s almost always some drugs involved. Two, we’ve all been there before…we get a little too angry, and we say some things we don’t mean. We might even bite our golfin’ buddy’s nose off. Y’know…just some stuff boiling over. But, once we cool down, we come to our senses a bit. I bet that’s what happened in this story – he made it half way to Mexico and thought, “what have I done? What am I doing?” Honestly, I don’t know how we got here necessarily, but this is suddenly sounding like one hell of a redemption story. The Hallmark movie they make over this incident is going to be so heartwarming and fantastic.

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD, #BeBetter, and ‘Minds right, asses tight.’ “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, Yankee Candle, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley.

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