I can’t for the life of me explain why, but it damn sure seems like Applebee’s just simply takes great pleasure in getting people as fucked up as humanly possible. Every month, they’re serving up some sort of $1 cocktail that is strong enough to fuel a Nissan Titan. Long island teas, Dollaritas….you name it, and Applebee’s is trying to to see how much the human body can take. It’s like they’re trying to replace your blood with alcohol. I admire it. Don’t get me wrong – I’m not judging here. I think it’s a dangerous game they’re playing, and hopefully, everyone who partakes has a designated driver to get home safely. But, it’s amazing to see in real life. Apparently, they’re at it again…this time, getting into the rum bucket game.
Applebee's new drinks : $10 buckets !!! There are 3 1/2 shots in each bucket. pic.twitter.com/yewP3eyX4o
— ✨THE•BIGGEST✨ (@Big_Dreez89) June 4, 2023
Oh man, I love it. There’s nothing that says summer time like a rum bucket. My wife and I try to get a pair any time we head to the beach in the summer time. I can only imagine what these things taste like, and apparently according to @Big_Dreez89, they’re only $10 and contain 3.5 shots of liquor. I’m in. Say no more fam. Get me an Uber, and get me a room at the hospital because we’re goin’ hard tonight. These things will put hair on your chest. Careful not to light a match around them.
The Applebee’s marketing people deserve a ton of credit. I don’t know where they came up with the money to run non-stop ads on Sunday Night Football, but we’re not going to ask those kinds of questions here. They’re back, baby! They’re in the national spotlight where they belong, and part of the reason is from word-of-mouth stuff like this. Don’t have a billion dollars to spend on an ad? Just make the most alcoholic drinks possible, charge people dirt cheap for them, and trust that all of us degenerates are just going to go around telling our degenerate friends. It’s brilliant and I love it so much.
And, before I dip out of here and let you guys enjoy your Friday thinking about these Applebee’s rum buckets, allow me to once again call for more Applebee’s to open up in the middle Tennessee area. I’m out here in Mount Juliet. We used to have one in Hermitage. Now I have to drive to Berry Hill for the only Applebee’s in the area. SMDH – I quite literally CAN’T eat good in my neighborhood. That needs to change. Nashville, let’s start the petition today.
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Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD, #BeBetter, and ‘Minds right, asses tight.’ “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, Yankee Candle, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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