As far as marrying supernatural beings go, I don’t know that a ghost is the direction I’d head in. I’m a physical man who lives his life with great passion with hips that were made for thrusting. So, we would have to have a really strong bond for me to sacrifice that. I guess there are ways that you can make love to a ghost – MacGruber taught us that in 2010. But, I don’t know. I think I’d rather go with a vampire. I’d have to give up food, and I love food, in exchange for sucking blood for all of eternity. But, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – I bet human blood hits like crack if you’re a vampire. Probably disgusting for you and me, us regular ol’ humans, to go chug a pint of blood. That’s why we have such a difficult time fathoming it. But, if you’re on the other side of it, man, I bet it’s a real treat. Nonetheless, we’re here today to talk about someone else’s decision to marry a ghost and then divorce the ghost after she suspected he was cheating on her.
“A woman who says she married then divorced a ghost has adopted a possessed clown — but says it’s made her ex jealous.”
That’s the first line of the story! This is some Grade A stuff from the NY Post though, and I don’t feel like I say that very often. Usually, these things are a blurb or a literal bullet list with 5-6 items and a video to go with it. This is some real quality journalism, and I’m stoked that they took the time to really tell this story. I guess it goes to show that you just never know – maybe some physical boundaries exist in that relationship, but what’s a ghost capable of when they don’t respect them? I don’t know if this is just one of those things that are bound to fail from the jump. It’s like cats and dogs – they might try to hump one another every once in awhile, but at the end of the day, you know they can’t be together forever.
Regardless, I would be inconsolable if my ghost wife cheated on me. I’m already going out on a limb here just to be with her – you know all my friends would think I’m crazy. “Dude, what the fuck are you doing with a ghost?” I get it. And, I would sit there and take it just for the opportunity to be with the spirit I loved. How is that reciprocated? You go and find another ghost to do ghost sex with? I’d be devastated. I got enough problems with living entities that reside in my plane of existence. I don’t need to open that shit up for entities on the other side of that veil.
It sounds like everybody in the story is doing fine, though. This lady even linked up with a clown doll that is possessed by the spirit of a guy who was a circus clown that performed tricks for people who didn’t care about him. These two are about to put out the best album of all time.
Image courtesy of Jr Korpa on Unsplash!
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD, #BeBetter, and ‘Minds right, asses tight.’ “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, Yankee Candle, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley.
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