Mike Clay’s Offensive Line Rankings Have Put My Brain in a Pretzel

Mike Clay's offensive line rankings have put my brain in a pretzel.

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Hey, I’d like to say up front that I have no issue with Mike Clay whatsoever. I’m not too familiar with his work at all actually, but he’s been putting out all of these rankings recently that have been retweeted and spat out onto my feed like crazy. It’s the summer time – I see a lot of rankings. No big deal. Everyone is doing rankings at this time of the year! But, I saw his offensive line rankings the other day and they just about blew my wig clean off my skull.

This thing is just the right amount of credible and zany to make me wonder if it’s even real or not. I mean, I have absolutely no qualms with the Detroit Lions and Cleveland Browns being ranked #1 and #2. I really like the Falcons and Packers offensive lines too, so I’m pretty harmonious with those teams being in the top 10. I’m even on the Titans hype train! I think they’re going to be a surprise top notch unit by the end of 2024, so I can get with the top 10 ranking for them too!

But, then why are the Chargers so low? That’s a solid group from left to right. Why are the Ravens so low? They have a stud left tackle, a stud center, and a promising right tackle. I can get why the Steelers are so low because there’s a lot of young unproven talent in that room, but damn, they look good on paper too! What are we doing here, man?!?! The Broncos at #8?!?! The Raiders at #14?!? I’m all over the place here.

What has really sent me is how low the Jags, Cardinals, and Seahawks are. I mean, I know it wasn’t a consistent rookie season for Paris Johnson, but the guy looks like a future franchise left tackle in the making. Hjalte Froholdt was a serviceable enough center that has room to grow. They added Jonah Williams and Isaiah Adams to a line that also includes Will Hernandez. That’s a good group with some promise! The Jags have four solid veteran options along with right tackle Anton Harrison, who is one of the best young right tackles in the game. And, I don’t know what the hell I’ve missed from the promising rookie seasons of Charles Cross and Abe Lucas that has that unit ranked at the bottom of this list. That list doesn’t even have the massive upgrade at right guard in Christian Haynes and the upstart Olu Oluwatimi on it either! There’s no way these are the three worst offensive lines in the league. This sounds like insanity to me – my brain is in a pretzel. Here’s how I’d break ’em down:

My top 5:

  1. Detroit Lions
  2. Cleveland Browns
  3. Kansas City Chiefs
  4. Atlanta Falcons
  5. Los Angeles Chargers

My bottom 5:

28. Carolina Panthers
29. Los Angeles Rams
30. Washington Commanders
31. Miami Dolphins
32. New York Giants

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD, #BeBetter, and ‘Minds right, asses tight.’ “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, Yankee Candle, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley.

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