It’s that time of the week again. Let’s get those grievances off our chests.
Rubber Rooster:
To people who clap during movies, why?
I’ll preface this with saying that there are a lot of reasons I don’t go to movie theaters anymore. From being too expensive to just generally not wanting to interact with people, it doesn’t seem worth it. I much rather cuddle up with my boo on the couch or in bed, with our own snacks (alcohol), and be comforted by the fact that if I have to pee then I can pause the movie.
However, the one thing that annoys me to the point of anger are people trying to interact with the movie. People laughing or crying in reasonable amounts is fine, but why on God’s green Earth do people clap? Don’t fucking tell me that people just want to express their enjoyment.
WHO ARE THEY EXPRESSING TO?
The other members of the audience? It’s certainly not to the actors, directors, or producers. And I couldn’t care less about a stranger’s opinions or feelings. It makes no difference to me just how pleased the other viewers are. In fact, I would rather they stormed out fuming. At least that wouldn’t diminish my experience and there’s one less person shifting in their seat, looking at their phone, or loudly snacking in general.
So great, you clapped. There’s no one to accept your applause, you goon. And not only are you being a useless moron, but you have pulled me out of the story with your loud monkey paws and are drowning out the actual movie. Thanks for ruining everything, you shitty mouth-breather.
Stoney Keeley (@StoneyKeeley):
Wrestling fans these days just cannot be pleased. I’m pointing to you, IWC (Internet Wrestling Community). If you watched the past four days of wrestling (Battleground, Raw, Smackdown, NXT), and have found ANYTHING to complain about, you are either the king/queen of internet trolling, are a complete moron, or simply can’t be pleased. This has been one of the greatest weeks in wrestling in ages.
Seriously, Finn Balor finally got his call up to the main roster after nearly eight full months of eager anticipation. He not only gets drafted to Raw, but he pins Roman Reigns clean in his Raw debut and wins a championship match against Seth Rollins at Summerslam.
My mind was blown – not only was Balor’s arrival huge, but he’s getting a monstrous push and competing for a championship on the second biggest show of the year! The IWC should finally be happy and shut up, right?
Wrong. I’ve seen some of these bottom-feeding butt hurt idiots complaining that Balor is getting pushed ahead of guys like Sami Zayn, Kevin Owens, and Cesaro.
You’ve got to be kidding me.
For months and months, you talk about how Balor deserves to be a featured star, how he’s the best wrestler in WWE, and how awesome his face paint and boyish charming smile is. Now, he’s being booked to be just that – a main event blue-chip superstar! And, you’re mad about it? Fuck right off.
Either face facts, look in the mirror, and realize you probably just shouldn’t watch wrestling or just shut your (probably) fat mouth and enjoy the show.
No one cares about your opinion, anyway. Don’t act like you’re some credible authority on wrestling. I hate you – fully and completely.
Whew – that felt good. Remember, to submit your own Thursday Rant, hit us up on Facebook or on Twitter @SoBrosNetwork. See you next Thursday.
