The people have been asking for it. Fans all over the world are demanding to know. I’m starting to get the feeling that a lot of people just can’t get into the Christmas spirit because I haven’t posted this yet. So, it is high time for me to sit down and hash out my definitive top 10 Christmas songs list.
As you know, I’m kind of a ‘top 10’ guy – I like counting down everything. And, guess what – I’m chock full of Christmas spirit and have been listening to NOTHING but Christmas music at work for the last 15 workdays.
It’s been surprisingly intense, and there’s been a lot of ravenous dancing and contemplating through a furrowed brow. But, I don’t want to waste any more of your time. Let’s get to the countdown.
Honorable Mention: Adam Sandler, “The Hanukkah Song” – You know I’m going to be inclusive here. Have to give a shout out to all the Jews out there celebrating the Festival of Lights.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KX5Z-HpHH9g]
10. Sessions Presents “A Peter Griffin Christmas” – Always one of the first albums to pop into my head come mid-November. You just can’t kick off the holidays without it.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Arov0NjZetE]
9. The Used, “Alone This Holiday” – Ugh, I’m kind of grossed out listening to this again. I can just see young emo Stoney with his long hair, thinking he was so cool. Regardless of what a dipshit young Stoney was, this song is still #memories.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DfK8mH6E4hA]
8. Bruce Springsteen, “Merry Christmas, Baby” – It doesn’t get any better than The Boss, and damn it, if you can listen to this song without tapping your toes, you’re a robot.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xeMY6R72XKE]
7. Tchaikovsky, “The Nutcracker Suite” – Yes. I mean the entire fucking play.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8J8urC_8Jw]
6. Jose Feliciano, “Feliz Navidad” – One of the most underrated Christmas jams out there. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wandered around singing this song. Not always in appropriate venues, either.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RTtc2pM1boE]
5. Nat King Cole, “The Christmas Song” – As a kid, I used to laugh when they sang “chestnuts roasting on an open fire.” Think Nature Boy and I had alterred the lyrics to “Jeff’s nuts,” but that was just us being the creative geniuses we are. We just didn’t realize it yet. That’s the moment I knew this comedy blog was my destiny.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SOszvL9lgSs]
4. Trans-Siberian Orchestra, “Wizards in Winter” – Part Christmas cheer. Part adrenaline rush. It all depends on the drugs you’re on, but I can assure you this jolt of energy will get you fired up regardless.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XFLOh44P5z0]
And, no! You aren’t getting the version with the Christmas lights synced up to the song. That’s disrespectful. Enjoy the music. You can see a light show any time the Pink Floyd laser show is down at Adventure Science Center or wherever it is in Nashville.
3. Andy Williams, “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” – Honestly, I don’t know if this song was written about Christmas or the culmination of the football season, but I love it.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gFtb3EtjEic]
2. Bing Crosby & The Andrews Sisters, “Mele Kalikimaka” – Something about Bing Crosby’s voice just soothes the soul. Just such a good song, and has nothing at all to do with the pool scene in Christmas Vacation when we all thought we were about to see some boobs.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0XHk_8izVqY]
1. Bobby Helms, “Jingle Bell Rock” – Yep. In my book, this is the quintessential Chrismas song. Little bit of groove to dance to. Major hook that I can belt out loudly. It’s the perfect encapsulation of the season.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=itcMLwMEeMQ&w=560&h=315]
Thanks for tuning in. I’ll leave you with another honorable mention as a secret code for well wishes. Merry Christmas, you filthy animals.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZ6yQgBvuoI]
Hell yeah that’s some Thomas Kinkade looking shit going on. Little known fact: I’m a big Thomas Kinkade guy. For real this time…Merry Christmas.
Stoney Keeley is the editor of the SoBros Network, Tennessee Titans Featured Analyst for Pro Football Spot, Contributor to FanSided’s Bama Hammer, and covers the WWE for WrestlingNews.co. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley, @PFSpot, @WrestlingNewsCo, @Bama_Hammer
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