A Very Serious Critique of Luke Bryan’s “Most People Are Good”

Share This Post

If you live in Nashville, hearing country music is inevitable. Hearing good country music is unlikely, but hearing terrible country music is not only likely, but probable. We can get into a big discussion on what the latest craze of bro-country and pop country has done to the traditional roots of country music, how the art of story-telling has been turned belly up by feel-good anthems, and how the growth of Nashville as an entertainment mecca has effectively killed its old-time grit. But, that’s not why we’re here today, folks. Nope. Instead, I’d like to talk about hearing Luke Bryan’s hit “Most People Are Good” for the first time last week.

It was an innocent enough night. Traveling to Cinco de Mayo for a whole meal of food with my lovely girlfriend, and the tune comes on. I immediately look at her and say, “this is bad…this is like…real bad.” Lyric after lyric, I found myself shaking my head in disagreement with Mr. Bryan. I did not approve of this message. And, simply proclaiming it to my audience of one was not enough.

I don’t want this kind of lazy utopian thought permeating throughout my town. So, let’s do a breakdown, folks. Let’s hit some of the highlights:

I believe kids oughta stay kids as long as they can
First line. Right off the bat, I think this is dumb. Could you imagine if kids didn’t grow up? If we ended up with a planet of children climbing trees because they wanted to stay kids as long as they could. How would we procreate? What would happen to the future of the human race if all the adults eventually died out because kids were choosing to be kids well into their 40s? Who would pay all the bills?
I believe we gotta forgive and make amends
‘Cause nobody gets a second chance to make new old friends
What if someone murders your entire family? Should you make amends and become new old friends with that person? Try telling that to Frank Castle, buddy.
I believe most people are good
And most mama’s oughta qualify for sainthood
There are approximately 85 million mothers in the United States alone. We’re not even talking about all the mothers in the world. Talk about diluting the saint pool. What would it mean to be a saint if there were so many of them? Think about that, Mr. Bryan.
I believe this world ain’t half as bad as it looks
I believe most people are good
FALSE. Most people are assholes.
I believe that youth is spent well on the young
‘Cause wisdom in your teens would be a lot less fun
Wisdom in your teens might have saved a few drunk driving accidents, drug overdoses, and teen pregnancies from happening, but yeah, you’re right, Mr. Bryan – it would be a lot less fun.
I believe that days go slow and years go fast
And every breath’s a gift, the first one to the last
I…..I’m actually okay with this one…
I believe most people are good
Again, FALSE – most people are assholes. Mr. Bryan creates a completely unrealistic picture of reality in this lyrical poem. I take issue with it and have so made my points known. Thank you all for reading this empirical critique along with me today. It’s been a fun exercise.
Go Nashville!

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley

Buy our shirt. Like us on Facebook. Follow us on Twitter @SoBrosNetwork. Listen on SoundCloud. Watch on YouTube. Shop our store on Redbubble.

Credit image to Federico Respini on Unsplash!

Subscribe To Our Newsletter

Get updates and learn from the best

More To Explore