I’m not a big sweets guy, I’ll admit. But, I find that, on occasion, nothing goes down quite as smoothly and satisfyingly as an entire sleeve of Oreos and a tall glass of milk. Well, big news out of the dessert snack world this week as Oreo has announced three new flavors. We the people get to vote on our favorite until June 30th, and the winner will get a chance to stick around.
Cookie monster’s taste buds must be tingling.
There are three new Oreo flavors on the market for children, adults, and aficionados alike to try out.
Some may ask: why not just leave well enough alone? But that’s how the cookie crumbles and Oreo left it up to fans to decide.
The three competing cookie flavors are Cherry Cola, which comes with a popping candy surprise on the inside, Kettle Corn, and Pina Colada Thins.
If you’re looking to put your taste buds to the test, the cookie company says all three are available nationwide and voting is open between April 30 and June 30.
Man. My initial reaction to this is, “why mess with success?” The original Oreo works so well. If you want to improve ’em, take a page out of the double stuft playbook and just keep adding more cream (that’s what she said). Make Oreos so thick that you have to eat them with a fork and a knife. So much cream, it’s like consuming an entire carton of half & half. That’s how you’d get me on the hook for my entire life, anyway.
I guess it’s just a case of keeping up with the Joneseses or whatever. It’s obviously a blatant ripoff of Lay’s’s (whatever) “do me a flavor” contest, and I can’t hate on a company for marketing. But, I don’t care anything about pop rocks in my cookies. And, when I’m craving kettle corn….I’m probably just going to eat….y’know….kettle corn.
I promise I’m not being a hater, though. I’m all on board with the pina colada Oreos. That could become the greatest sensation of the Summer. In fact, replace your tall glass of milk with a pina colada to dip your pina colada Oreos in. I’m fixin’ to be shitfaced on pina colada Oreos out on Center Hill Lake for the entirety of lake season.
On a side note, congrats to our friends at WKRN for getting to try these out:
New @Oreo flavors are here!
And we’re going to be some of the first to try them on @WKRN News 2 at 4
Initial reactions on air are always good #MyOREOCreation pic.twitter.com/Uo6ljyBJnV— Cherish Lombard (@cherishlombard) April 30, 2018
Maybe one day when we’re famous people will send us new Oreos to try instead of constant “improve your Google rank” spam phone calls. Our SEO is just fine, thank you scammers.
Can’t help but wonder when these will hit shelves, though:
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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