A biscuit is a terrible thing to waste. That’s common knowledge, but especially here in Nashville where you can stumble blindfolded into good biscuits, it’s not unlike throwing away money. Never mind using one as a weapon in an assault! But, unfortunately for one woman, some asshole tried to use one as his weapon of choice. Thankfully, it’s a biscuit, and they arrested the dude before he did any real physical damage.
Courtesy of our friends over at WKRN:
A Nashville man is accused of using a biscuit as his weapon of choice in an attack on a woman Sunday.
It happened in the 2300 block of Murfreesboro Pike in South Nashville.
Metro police reported 45-year-old Jeffrey Tomerlin saw his ex-girlfriend in a car with her new boyfriend when he walked up and threw a biscuit at her face.
Tomerlin then reportedly charged at the car, punching the hood and yelling he would kill them.
During his arrest, police said Tomerlin kept banging his head inside the police cruiser. He was taken to General Hospital to be checked out before he was booked into the Metro jail.
Sadly enough, using a biscuit as a weapon may be the strangest part of this whole story. And, don’t get me wrong – this is a wild ass story. Can you imagine?
I think if I had a biscuit thrown in my face, I would have a hard time recovering from that. “What is happening right now?” I probably wouldn’t even notice the maniac punching the hood of my car and threatening to kill me.
But, all biscuits aside, you have to be a complete unhinged lunatic to pull some shit like this. Bangin’ your head in a cop car. GTFO of here, dude. Act like a grown ass man.
Remember the words of the great, wise, and powerful Todd Christley: “class, not ass.”
Show some class. You see your ex with a new man, tough shit. That’s life – maybe if you weren’t punching cars and throwing biscuits at people, none of this would’ve happened.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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