Despite living in Nashville, which is most notably NOT a good wings city, I’m a big fan of the occasional basket of wings. There’s just something about the flavor of a good buffalo wing that brings out a craving in my soul. It’s messy, it’s an explosion of taste, and it’s the perfect meal to go with a good cold beer.
Well, in case you missed it, Business Insider came out and said we’re doing wings all wrong now. I’m gonna go ahead and call bullshit, but you can watch the video and decide for yourself.
You've probably been eating chicken wings all wrong — here's the right way to do it pic.twitter.com/haxffuNfWf
— Business Insider (@businessinsider) June 16, 2017
First of all, I don’t trust that you got all the bone and cartilage out of that chicken wing. If you bite into that, there’s a good chance you’re going to get some leftover chunks that are going to ruin your grill.
Second of all, who the fuck cooked that chicken? That chicken looks like it barely made it out of the freezer. There’s definitely no seasoning on it. That guy in the video definitely has rabies now, or salmonella, or ebola, or whatever the hell comes from eating raw chicken. Maybe all three.
Third of all, NO THAT’S WRONG. Part of the enjoyment of wings is getting to relish the feeling of pulling meat off the bone with our teeth. I’m a carnivore. I own this chicken and now I’m going to show him who’s the boss by pulling his flesh off the bone with my teeth.
I’m usually a fan of efficiency, and this does seem rather efficient, but I’m going to have to give in to my animalistic instinct on this one. Eating wings like this is definitely a beta move, but I also think it’s completely insane, too.
Thank you for your time.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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