Man, I don’t know how we ended up in the business of writing about strange food, but here we are. This has been some of our most popular shit over the last several months, and it seems like this stuff just keeps getting more and more outrageous. Like, if I’m writing about the Arby’s meat carrot, I gotta write about the Oscar Mayer Ice Dog Sandwich, right?!?!
Who eats just mustard @Frenchs? Condiments were made for Oscar Mayer hot dogs. Say hello to the Oscar Mayer Ice Dog Sandwich – flavored ice cream, made with our better hot dogs, sandwiched with spicy mustard . Do you want to try this? Coming in August #OscarMayerIceCream
— Oscar Mayer (@oscarmayer) August 1, 2019
WHOMST among us thought, “you know what this ice cream sandwich needs? Mustard and chunks of hot dogs.”
Or, conversely, WHOMST among us thought, “you know what would make this hot dog even better? Cookies and vanilla ice cream.”
Fuck this sandwich and definitely not in a ‘SILF’ type of way.
This isn’t at least funny, messing with people like this, y’know? The KFC Cheetos gimmick is one thing because chicken and cheetos actually go well together. But, go smash some damn hot dogs up in a tub of vanilla ice cream and tell me how appetizing it is. I don’t know – this just doesn’t seem right. Will I try it for #CONTENT? You bet – I will Johnathan Wolf this shit right off the top rope. I will die for this shit.
But, I don’t want to. I really don’t want to. In fact, I don’t even want to let y’all know this exists. I’m gonna have people reaching out like, “I NEED A SOBROS REVIEW OF THIS ASAP.”
Time to call Righteous Jesse, I guess, but I’m not going to let that man die alone.
I most definitely have some questions about this, though. 1) Why the hell wouldn’t you put the mustard and hot dog flavors together? Why is all the mustard on one side and the hot dog on the other? It ain’t a hot dog and mustard ice cream sandwich. It’s a half-mustard half-hot dog ice cream sandwich and that seems like a YUGE disconnect from what Oscar Mayer is trying to promote here.
Okay, I guess that’s really the only question I have here. Can’t wait to try this and puke my fucking guts out this month.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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