Welcome all degenerate gamblers back into my weekly American football column, Tank the 401k. Here, I will divulge all my eagle-eyed opinions on the upcoming week. Call your bookie and empty those retirement accounts (actually, don’t really do that – this is just sarcasm. My lawyers say I shouldn’t claim to be an expert on anything)!
I go up to New Jersey. I put my money where my mouth is. Every ticket I punched, I put in Florida Atlantic -5.5 hosting Marshall. Serves me FUCKING RIGHT for dipping back into college. At least I got Florida -5 last week – we’re leveling out here. It’s a natural process halfway through the season.
At 60%, I’m still not feeling too good about myself.
BIG NATURAL’S TANK THE 401K PICKS
NCAAF: Ohio State -14.5 vs. Wisconsin – I’m buyin’ in on the Buckeyes big time. It’s a huge showdown between Heisman contenders in Justin Fields and Jonathan Taylor, but I think Fields will be the one that gets his real Heisman moment. For all the talk the Badgers defense is getting, don’t sleep on that Buckeyes defense only allowing eight points per game. The Buckeyes are much more explosive all around than the Badgers.
NFL: Seattle -3.5 @ Atlanta – I’ve been picking on that Falcons defense for what feels like all season. Why stop now?
NFL: Carolina @ San Francisco, OVER 42.5 – These two teams are crazy similar from a stats perspective. Both are going to run the ball and play defense. But, I don’t know that either defense has played an offense quite like the other. The Panthers have more takeaways and less giveaways than the 49ers. That turnover differential is going to be huge in the game, but I don’t know that I’m willing to pull the trigger on Carolina as a road dog. Given that both offenses are averaging over 26 PPG, I think the over here is the safer play. By the way, Christian McCaffrey is my MVP of the season so far.
NFL: Indianapolis -5.5 vs. Denver – The Colts defense is better than the numbers suggest (23 PPG). Faced with a Broncos offense that outright stinks, they should win this one comfortably at home.
NFL: New York Giants @ Detroit, OVER 49.5 – Don’t let last week’s blowout loss to the Vikings fool you…the Lions are actually decent. I don’t know that they’re beat-anybody-in-the-NFL-by-seven decent, but they’re decent enough. With both of these defenses allowing 26.7 points per game, I think the over’s the better play here. Daniel Jones and company have shown an ability to score on bad defenses, and the Lions shouldn’t be too concerned with putting points on the board themselves. This one could end 34-30 or something like it.
W-L Record: (4-2)
Last Week: (3-2)
On the Season: (18-12-0) – 60%
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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