Ladies and gentlemen, I have some unfortunate news to report today. As some of you know, the SoBros Network has been at the front lines, reporting on the animal kingdom’s War on Humans, as they attempt to take back the world from the virus that is humanity. Well today, I have quite the disturbing video to share with you all. It would appear as though a group of rambunctious crabs has attempted to take over an airport.
WHO FLEW WITH CRABS?! pic.twitter.com/c0cux6Jyyi
— Reese Waters (@reesewaters) April 16, 2020
What a SCENE! It is just pure, full-on pandemonium at the airport as the crabs are literally CRAWLING off the luggage carousel. People legit have no idea what to do, and I honestly can’t say that I blame them. I’d probably say ‘fuck the bags’ and just take off running. You don’t know which one of these little fiends is carrying a knife on him, ready to cut your ass. I don’t know what the airport worker at the beginning of the video was trying to do…like trying to soak up a lake with a towel, but bless his heart for trying.
That one little dude gets his bearings and starts to straight roll up on homeboy with the camera. He was ready to storm the fuckin’ Alamo alone before he pulled up and waited for back-up. That’s the wild card you gotta watch out for. That crab was ready to die for the cause.
Alternate joke: Quick! Somebody get the Old Bay!
Also, yeah, who the hell flew with crabs in their luggage?
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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