At this point, talking about all of the people moving to Tennessee is akin to the jaded Nashvillian making fun of pedal taverns and bachelorette parties. It’s just too easy. It’s so easy, in fact, that it’s become a bit stale, y’know? We gotta work on some new things, as jaded Nashvillians, to make fun of about our city and state.
But, corny jokes aside, the fact remains that there is a, scientifically speaking, metric fuck ton of people that keep moving to Tennessee. I don’t know where they’re coming from. It’s like they’ve only recently discovered the vibrant seasons and beautiful landscape…and of course, the hot chicken. We can’t forget the hot chicken. We’ve seen this pop up what feels like once a month for the last five years. Some different source spouting some different metric they’ve come up with to show us all just how many people are moving to Tennessee as if we just can’t believe.
I want to scream – “yeah, we’re HERE. We can see it – all these transplants driving the unicorns out….” (Aside: a ‘unicorn’ refers to a native Nashvillian – something growing increasingly rare). Anyway, the latest source to bring up such a thing happens to be *checks notes* U-Haul.
Yes….U-Haul.
The Volunteer State posted the largest net gain of U-Haul® trucks crossing its borders in 2020, making it the No. 1 U-Haul growth state for the first time.
Growth states are calculated by the net gain of one-way U-Haul trucks entering a state versus leaving that state in a calendar year. Migration trends data is compiled from more than 2 million one-way U-Haul truck customer transactions that occur annually.
The U-Haul blog!?!? Who out there is reading the U-Haul blog? Is there enough demand for U-Haul content that they finally gave in and said, “guess we gotta do it, guys?” Ah hell – who am I kidding? I have no right to talk – who the hell said, “we really need Stoney Keeley’s opinions on the internet” back in 2013? The fact that no one gives a shit about my opinions or who I am hasn’t stopped me a day since. I just keep spouting off shit into the void. Anyway, back to U-Haul…
I mean, I guess they would know, right? This is impressive – they’re basically data analysts at this point. We keep looking at the real estate market, when all we had to do was call up the folks at U-Haul to get a gauge on where folks were moving.
I love some of the reasons they provide in the post, too – no income tax, jobs, tourism, and best of all, “southern hospitality.” Where have y’all been? How is the rest of the United States just now figuring this out? Tennessee fuckin’ rules if you can tolerate the ideological suppression of science and all that.
Yeah, no state income tax is fuckin’ awesome. It IS a great place to start a business. There’s a ton of stuff to do in Nashville…err…more like “a ton of places to get drunk in Nashville,” which, for me, is awesome. There’s a ton of stuff to do around Nashville – loads of outdoors to explore. Shout out to the Smoky Mountains. They rule, too.
I gotta say, though – I’m over the whole “southern hospitality” thing. Just be direct with me. I don’t want to have to guess whether or not you’re being nice to me because you actually like me or not.
Come to Tennessee. Come all you want. I don’t care – we got U-Haul monitoring the situation. If too many people start coming, U-Haul is just gonna start mowing you guys down. That’s how things would work in Stoney’s America.
I feel like this post just took a turn so I’m gonna bow out now.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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