What a wild story coming out of McDonald’s recently – apparently, some dude in South Carolina set up shop at a local McDonald’s and was just tatting some kid up in the booth. People will laugh and/or gasp at this story, but the honest truth is that we can learn something from every tale that scrolls across our social media feeds. Take me, for instance – today I learned that it’s actually illegal to tattoo a child. Who would’ve known? Not me. I’m glad I read this, though – now I know better than to tattoo my kids if or when I have any.
A South Carolina man accused of tattooing a juvenile in a fast-food restaurant has been arrested and is facing charges, police said.
The Aug. 6 incident came to the attention of police last week after some detectives were tagged on social media posts showing video of the child being tattooed, Latimore said.
During an ensuing investigation, authorities determined Presha was the unlicensed tattoo artist and that the individual receiving the tattoo was a juvenile, Latimore said. She did not provide the child’s age or elaborate.
Damn, I guess McDonald’s is having to get really inventive and creative with the prizes in their Happy Meals these days. I mean, shit – I get it. You can only go so far with toys before eventually, you’re just recycling the same old shit out there. I swear there are probably five generations of Spider-Man toys from McDonald’s Happy Meals floating around out there. Kids are just getting bored with it. But, you know what’s not boring? Getting a tattoo.
How’s that for a crazy new promotion? What kid wouldn’t want a tattoo with their Happy Meal? I can already see the commercials now – “stop on in for some chicken mcnuggets, apple slices, and our guy Brandon here will give you some fresh ink.” How many kids would be walking around with Caillou’s fucking face tatted across their shoulder? Some people might say this is distasteful, but listen – I’m a progressive guy. It’s 2021. Get with the times, people. Don’t be an old curmudgeon shaking your fist at the sky. Kids can get tattoos in McDonald’s if they want to these days. I commend McDonald’s for being so progressive and getting outside the box in a way to get more kids to eat mcnuggies. You’re just going to be on the wrong side of history for this one.
Steven McCash and I broke down this story and a lot of other ridiculous news stories on the most recent episode of the SoBros Power Hour, which you can listen to HERE:
Listen to “Ep. 50: Tattooing Kids at McDonald's” on Spreaker.Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD, #BeBetter, and ‘Minds right, asses tight.’ “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, Yankee Candle, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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