Tank the 401k Gambling Picks: 10/28/21

The boys are coming off of back-to-back 11-4 weeks as a team. Tank the 401k is ROLLING right now!

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Welcome all degenerate gamblers back into our weekly American football betting column here on the SoBros Network, Tank the 401k. Call your bookie and empty those retirement accounts (actually, don’t really do that – this is just sarcasm. Our lawyers say we shouldn’t claim to be experts on anything because we’re not)! Each week, the SoBros team up to offer their five locks of the week – obviously, we’re not professionals here so take this advice with a grain of salt and don’t sue us if you piss all of your money away. That’s not our fault. Okay, I think we’re all set here – here are this week’s SoBros gambling picks.

STAN’S PICKS

4-1 last week. 13-2 in my last 15. The team is on fire. If you are not following these free picks, I guess you like giving your bookie money? The hot streak continues….

Coastal Carolina – under 52 – I hate unders. I hate unders on a Thursday night but here we are.
Michigan/MSU – under 50.5 – I think this goes WAY under.
Maryland -5.5 – no brainer
Panthers +3 – I don’t think they are as bad as that Giants loss and they’re not getting any respect.
Titans +1.5 – This has to be a trap? Right? Well I’m falling for it.

Steven’s Picks

I don’t deserve to type something witty or clever because I’m so far under .500 I’m choking on my own farts. Take my 5 picks and bet the opposite. (I’m trying reverse psychology here, fingers crossed)

Arizona -6
Titans +1.5
Iowa St. -7
Georgia -14
SMU Even

Stoney’s Picks

Georgia -14.5 – All due respect to Florida, but they are just not as good as anyone thought they’d be. I’ve been on the “Florida stinks” train all season. Ya just about had me after that Alabama game, but not since. The Bulldogs will jump up to 24-0 and sit on it for half the game. Florida might kick a couple field goals, so I could see this one ending 31-9 or something like that.
Kentucky -1.5 – This one feels like Jedi mind trick “there’s a reason they build big buildings in Vegas” kinda picks, but I love the Wildcats to slow down Mississippi State, pound the ball, and win comfortably.
Arizona State -15.5 – This number might seem big, but Arizona State still has explosive capabilities on offense, Washington State is in disarray, and they just might’ve shot their shot against BYU last week. I like the Sun Devils to beat up on a deflated Cougs team.
Tampa Bay -5.5 – Sorry, Steven….but I just don’t think Jameis is going to be able to out-duel Tom Brady in this one.
Cowboys -1.5 – Nope….not buying Minnesota after back to back wins over Detroit and Carolina. This Cowboys team is a different breed. They’re going to be able to name their score on Sunday Night Football.

SEASON STATS

Stan last week: (4-1)
Stan’s 2021 W-L: (25-14-1) – 64.1%
Steven last week: (2-3)
Steven’s 2021 W-L: (15-21-4) – 41.6%
Stoney last week: (5-0)
Stoney’s 2021 W-L: (22-18) – 55%
SoBros last week: (11-4) – 73.3%
SoBros 2021 W-L: (62-53-5) – 53.9%

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD, #BeBetter, and ‘Minds right, asses tight.’ “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, Yankee Candle, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley