In just two days from now, the 2022 installment of CMA Fest will be kicking off here in the Music City. Consequentially, traffic is going to be a fucking nightmare for those of you who will be trying to make it home during the festivities and figuring out which roads are closed and which are open. Thankfully, I got out of the downtown rat race four years ago. But, I can remember those days with hate in my heart. Hell, there was even one year that I asked to work from home during CMA Fest week to avoid it altogether. But, let’s forget me being the jaded Nashville native who is conflicted about all of this growth for a second. It’s a big week for the city. I’d say it’s probably -the- premiere Nashville event, with only the 4th of July and New Year’s Eve competing with it.
It is a June tradition unlike any other. This year, it’s running from Thursday June 9th to Sunday June 12th, and I have no exact count, but I’d estimate that a bajillion different country artists will take the stage, of which there are also approximately a bajillion. The Tennessean wrote a nice little compartmentalized guide to all of the events – so, it’s not too late to get to planning if it slipped your mind, but you’re still contemplating checking it out.
Truth be told, I’m out on CMA Fest (though I’ve been reconsidering that ever since I saw that Uncle Kracker is playing the Chevy Vibes Stage at Walk of Fame Park at 11:45AM on Friday). I doubt I will ever do it again in my lifetime. For one, I’m not a country music fan…so, like…that’s kind of an important component of this whole thing. If you don’t like country music and you go somewhere where country music is playing so loudly that it reverberates inside your skull for 14 hours, it’s not going to be a good experience. But, I did do CMA Fest once just to say I did it. Back in 2014, a few of us went downtown and moseyed around all of the free shows. We started at 9AM when we had McDonald’s breakfast, drinking Jack Daniel’s Tennessee Fire with it. 14 hours later, and I was puking while a certain contributor to this website who will remain nameless was laid passed out on our living room floor. That day is just a patchwork of memories. I did it big, and I’m good with retiring after that.
It’s one of a few certain Nashville events that I’m happy to tic off my bucket list, but don’t care to frequent. I watched the guitar drop on New Year’s Eve once, and then sat in what was essentially a mosh pit for 30 minutes trying to get out of the downtown area. We did 4th of July from the rooftop at Rock Bottom back in 2013. Being so close to the fireworks show, I was washing gun powder out of my hair for two days. Whether it’s for better or for worse, things are just different than they were when I was growing up. The crowds, the grandeur, the pageantry – it was there, but not to this scale. I promise I’m not going to turn this into another “Old Nashville” vs. “New Nashville” debate – it’s just an illustration of how things have changed over time and standing shoulder to shoulder in a group of strangers in the hot summer heat just isn’t for me.
But, CMA Fest is a good time. It’s important for Nashville, and y’all don’t have to listen to a hater like me running my mouth. I appreciate the event. I really do – it’s a sort of mecca for a lot of people, and even the staunchest of country music haters, like myself, can find a grand old time out of thin air.
If you think Nashville is already a city that has music percolating out of every corner, just wait ’til you see what happens Thursday. And, for those of you still stuck working office jobs later this week, well…there’s still time to get your PTO request in.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD, #BeBetter, and ‘Minds right, asses tight.’ “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, Yankee Candle, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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