Wherever we land on this discussion today, I would just like to point out that former Denver Broncos defensive Derek Wolfe does NOT sound like the type of person you’d want to fuck with. This is now twice this year that his name has popped up in conversations about things I don’t think your everyday guy is partaking in. Back in January, he put down a wild mountain lion that had been terrorizing his neighborhood, using a bow and arrow. Now, he’s making headlines from saying that he microdosed mushrooms and popped Adderall before games.
Former NFL player Derek Wolfe revealed that he would microdosed mushrooms and take Adderall before games.
— Dov Kleiman (@NFL_DovKleiman) March 24, 2023
He also shared that he played in an NFL game 2 weeks after being paralyzed for three hours
“I couldn’t move. But team doctors said you’re good.”
(via Joe Rogan Experience) pic.twitter.com/PCTlaHQDjD
He goes on to say that he told a quarterback he was going to eat his kids. That might sound extreme, but personally, I love the energy. Obviously, that is a callback to Mike Tyson saying “I’m gonna eat his children.” As far as trash talk goes, it is completely insane, jarring, and frightening. If someone says that to you, you just don’t know how to react. There’s a part of you that thinks, “what an awful thing to say,” and then there’s a part of you that thinks, “wait is he actually serious?” While you’re processing it, BOOM – Derek Wolfe hits you and you’re on your back. It’s effective – then you find out that he’s channeling his childhood rage and you can’t help but wonder if it’s a Water Boy situation where he’s just spouting things you don’t understand. I can’t tell if this is pure genius or pure insanity, and usually in these situations, that makes me lean ‘genius,’ which could also be a sign that I too am insane. What a wild card.
Now, our instincts are to read this story and say “holy shit – this is odd!” But, I think this is a far more layered issue than it appears on the surface. Is it impressive that he was able to function in such a state? Yes. I’m sorry, but I’m just being honest. I’m not trying to advocate for the use of drugs at your day jobs, but it honestly impresses me that he was able to channel that energy and perform at a high level for so long in the NFL. Beyond that though, it’s kind of sad because it does highlight the culture of “playing through it” in the NFL. This man was paralyzed for three hours, and the doctors were like “nah, you’re good to go” just two weeks later. I’m not saying there was anything nefarious going on – maybe there was. Maybe there wasn’t. I don’t know. But, it is an illustration of how players have to do everything they can to get on the field. That’s a different rabbit hole that we don’t have to go down this morning. But, it’s there for you if you want it.
If we’re ever going to build a real life Robocop, I nominate Derek Wolfe.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD, #BeBetter, and ‘Minds right, asses tight.’ “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, Yankee Candle, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley.
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