For the most part, we all strive to be decent human beings. Sure, there’s plenty of assholes out there who are evil just because. Immediately, guys like Hitler, Dahmer, and The Devil come to mind – just a real Hall of Fame class of bad guys.
I operate under a pretty simple premise: open up your heart and love will find its way in. Props to the Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman jewelry line for teaching me that mantra. It’s legit – I’m always open to make a new friend, but best believe, when it comes time to move on, I’m moving on.
A number of reasons can cause a relationship to go South, and we’ve all been there. Be it a “friend” taking advantage of your kindness, a boyfriend/girlfriend being a real ass/dick/bitch/douche, a tag team partner weighing you down who really needs to be thrown through a barber shop window, or any sort of relationship that takes your happiness. Any sort of relationship that doesn’t allow you to be your best you qualifies.
Sometimes, we’re caught up in the idea of being a good person and we’re afraid to break a heart or sever ties with someone. We struggle with this idea that not liking someone makes us morally inferior. That we’re supposed to tolerate and accept people….love everyone, all that mumbo jumbo. That’s all well and good, but if you apply it to each and every person you encounter, no matter their actions, you’re setting yourself up to be very disappointed in people. Because, people, in a very broad sense, don’t have what’s best for you at heart.
So, when you’re feeling that bro of your’s who keeps leaving his wallet at home when you go drinking is really just a freeloader, you suck it up and make excuses for him. That ain’t healthy for you. I was raised to “look out for number one.” It doesn’t mean I can’t treat people with respect. It doesn’t mean I can’t share what I have generously. It means that if I don’t look out for my own best interests, I will never retain them. I’ll constantly be living for someone else’s dreams or someone else’s convenience.
Despite a toxic situation, we don’t want to hurt feelings, but that ain’t healthy either. Realizing when to walk away from someone doesn’t make you a bad person, it means you recognize the importance of looking out for yourself. No one else will do it for you.
It’s an acquired skill that can only come with experience and wisdom. I usually give everyone every opportunity in the world to make a bad situation better. If they don’t put forth the effort, then boom – barber shop window. Okay, maybe not as extreme as the breakup of Shawn Michael and Marty Jannetty, but yeah – you get it. But, in doing so, I’ve managed to collect an incredible group of friends who have proven themselves. I’m in a relationship with a woman who makes me better. I have family that supports me, and a job that works for me.
Honing this skill and utilizing it will do wonders for your emotional health, business, finance. Like every other people skill, it’s important and useful.
Brandon had an interesting point on the SoBros Variety Show – how, as children, we all seek acceptance and approval. So, you want to hold on to those friends. As a youngster, all you see is school and those relationships. You don’t think it’s going to end, but really, it’s like an entirely different world post-graduation. For a lot of people, that’s the first time you really find out who your friends are (shout out to Tracy Lawrence).
I say it’s simple..
Step 1: Just be a good person.
Step 2: Allow yourself to connect with people and build relationships.
Step 3: Recognize if/when said relationships are becoming toxic, making you unhappy, etc. and talk them out with involved parties. Give someone every chance
Step 4: If necessary, don’t hesitate to throw said person through a barber shop window.
Check out our full discussion of this topic on Episode 1 of the SoBros Variety Show here:
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Stoney Keeley is the editor of the SoBros Network, Tennessee Titans Featured Analyst for Pro Football Spot, Contributor to FanSided’s Bama Hammer, and covers the WWE for WrestlingNews.co. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley, @PFSpot, @WrestlingNewsCo, @Bama_Hammer
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