This Tim Anderson plunking annoys me. Is there anything more ignorant than unwritten rules that encourage pitchers to plunk batters with two-seam and four-seam fastballs exceeding 90-mph?
An Apr. 17 matchup featuring the Chicago White Sox and Kansas City Royals featured an emptying of dugouts when Royals pitcher Brad Keller plunked the White Sox shortstop during the sixth inning of a 2-2 game. Earlier, Anderson celebrated a home run with a…bat flip. Gasp! The horror! God forbid someone display excitement in front of their home crowd. The plunked pitch struck Anderson on the anus. Had Anderson flinched poorly, then his jewels would have an adopted 92-mph fastball lodged in-between them.
“Just get the guy out?” Technically, Keller succeeded with that. Despite Anderson not retaliating against the pitcher, Umpire Joe West ejected Chicago’s hottest hitter. The Royals won in 10 innings, 4-3. Remember that, after West ejected Anderson from a Sep. 22 game last season, that Anderson responded with, “Everybody knows he’s terrible.”
I wrote about a similar incident involving Miami Marlins pitcher Jose Urena. On Aug. 15, 2018, Atlanta Braves outfielder Ronald Acuna Jr. was coming off three consecutive leadoff homers. Urena made certain that his first pitch—one of his all-time fastest pitches—plunked the 20-year-old squarely above the elbow. Acuna Jr., considered among MLB’s finest young talents, was inches away from a devastating injury that would’ve ended his season, possibly derailing his career.
Here’s a tidbit from that article where I went off on whom I referred to as a “Quad-A pitcher:”
I can’t help but imagine how Cleveland Browns head coach Hue Jackson would handle every situation. Mr. Crime Equals Playing Time. While what Urena did technically wasn’t a crime, it’s still an assault with a dangerous weapon. When the Braves and Marlins meet for a four-game series next week, Jackson would leave him in to pitch the entire game. Pitch count at 200? Nah, you’re staying in, brother. You gotta fight through it, man.
Obviously a tongue-in-cheek solution. How ironic that his next outing—Aug. 19 against the Washington Nationals—was a 108-pitch complete game victory. This was the first and only complete game of his career. The Marlins were on a 12-game road losing streak. It’s like my idea of punishment was the motivational speech that Urena needed to become an ace pitcher instead of his career 4.54 ERA self.
Remember this? Blake Bortles never had another good game. Am I a jinx? My criticism becomes motivation. My positivity and praise buries its victims 10 feet under.
Back on topic. The punishment for Urena: a six-game suspension. Most starting pitchers appear every five to six games. That means that Urena missed one start. Not even a slap on the wrist for a barely-MLB pitcher needlessly endangering one of the game’s future megastars.
Society craves violence. It’s ingrained in sports culture. Look how people reacted to Alexander Ovechkin knocking out Andrei Svechnikov. The 19-year-old Svechnikov entered concussion protocol. Outkick the Coverage host Clay Travis received severe backlash after speaking out against fighting. Critics took it as a slight against Ovechkin for defending himself. I saw it more as discouraging the act of fighting in an era where professional sports leagues supposedly take every measure to prevent severe head injuries. The NHL allowing and even encouraging fighting won’t accomplish that. It’ll only appease the most rabid of their fan base.
Hockey fighting is a topic in itself. It doesn’t bother me as much as baseball “fighting,” aka plunking. NHL players both agree to fight. They’re attacking with their bodies. Svechnikov shouldn’t challenge or accept a challenge from someone who’s much larger and experienced than him. Common sense can prevent most of these scenarios.
My grievance with plunking batters is that it isn’t slightly machismo—it’s assault. Pitchers are using weapons to attack unsuspecting hitters. What if a pitcher loses control or the batter twitches the wrong way or freezes? Catastrophe. Former Cleveland Indians shortstop Ray Chapman died when a pitch crushed his skull in 1920. The aforementioned Acuna Jr was inches away from a shattered elbow. How dare Acuna Jr. hit homers.
Plunking is literally the dumbest concept in sports. Keller is a pretty solid and underrated pitcher who doesn’t need to resort to such tactics. Either get the guy out or get out. The act itself is needlessly dangerous. It sends the wrong message about how to respond to failure.
I’m offended that you hit a homer / celebrated! I’ll teach you a lesson! Yeah, take THAT. You can’t handle my MACHISMO. My HASHTAG MACHISMO. Aight. I’mma head to the showers now. I’ll use some Dr. Squatch pine tar soap to help get a grip on my butthurt.
Fans pay big money to see competition. As long as players receive supersized contracts, then ticket prices will continue to increase. The least MLB can do is make sure they’re getting competition. Plunking doesn’t enhance the quality of the product.
All I know is that if I were a plunked batter, then I’m getting ejected. I won’t charge the mound. I’ll flip my bat all the way into the outfield. Then I’ll do Scotty 2 Hotty‘s “The Worm” all the way down the first base line.
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Joshua Huffman was born and edumacated in Middle Tennessee. He has published content for Yahoo! Sports (via Contributor Network) and Titan Sized, among other venues. At SoBros, he’ll provide Daily Fantasy Sports suggestions and broad sports coverage. Follow him on Twitter (although I rarely use it).
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