I cannot stress enough how wild of a start 2024 is off to. On Monday, I wrote about the nekkid guy jumping into the fish tank at the Bass Pro Shop. We’ve seen all kinds of crazy stuff floating around social media since. I’ve had a hard time prioritizing it, to be honest. It seems like the type of stuff that SoBros Network was born to cover, but I just can’t get to it all. I don’t know how much more I’ll get to, but I knew from the moment I got the Bass Pro Shop guy taken care of that this guy getting stuck in an urn at some party had to be next up on my list.
oh my god this is the whitest shit I’ve ever seen pic.twitter.com/ncTDlZr8Jb
— Kristi Yamaguccimane (@TheWapplehouse) January 7, 2024
There’s a whole thread of journalism on Twitter regarding the incident and it sounds wild, but I’m here just to break this video down. It’s amazing. It is pure chaos, and I love that we’re just dropped right into the action. There’s no buildup. We don’t see this happen. We have no insight whatsoever into what could possibly have made this guy think getting into this giant urn was a cool decision to make. It’s the equivalent of Rick Grimes waking up in the hospital with zombies all over the place. We’re just in it, man.
I can’t say that I’ve ever looked at a giant urn and wondered what it would be like to get in it. I can’t fathom that. It seems like this is the exact type of thing my brain would be worried about if that thought even remotely crossed my mind. “What if you get stuck?” Maybe that’s just my anxiety talking. Regardless, I applaud this man for not letting any such reservations hinder the possibility of such a good story.
This guy is highly quotable too. I know I’m going to catch myself screaming “I am doing everything I fucking can” at the slightest inconvenience from now on, but “I already took my belt off and that didn’t do shit” is a close second. I think it’s the accent that makes it so funny. We’ve all been there, though. Something is happening that you don’t quite understand. You’re in a pickle that you don’t know how you’re going to get out of. Then, one person says something that you find incredibly stupid and it just sets you off. I like the one man in the background who says “his knees are hitting…[INDISTINGUISHABLE].” Like, there were still people there who couldn’t believe it to the point that they had to feel his body stuck in that urn. It wasn’t enough to just see it. Classic urn guy!
I don’t have any updates as to what happened with this guy, but this video of people trying to chisel him out did surface:
I have been sent video of Connor being chiseled out of that pot, because of course pic.twitter.com/lmwKBW5Dks
— Bunkie Perkins (@BunkiePerkins) January 8, 2024
Absolutely love that the club music is still blaring at peak volume like nothing is going to stop that party.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD, #BeBetter, and ‘Minds right, asses tight.’ “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, Yankee Candle, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley.
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