My wife and I had the rare Sunday with nothing to do yesterday. After taking a lap around Target, she checked the movie times and noticed a screening of the new CoHo (that’s ‘Colleen Hoover’ for those who aren’t hip with the times) adaptation, It Ends With Us. I’m not going to claim to be a fan of Hoover’s novels, but my wife was happy, and as long as she’s happy, I’m happy. Plus, I’m not going to complain about a giant root beer and popcorn on a Sunday morning. The tickets were bought. While the romance genre isn’t exactly my favorite, I left the theater pleasantly surprised by a film that explores a dark, heavy subject matter with a plot that was nice and tight.
*SPOILER WARNING* There’s no way for me to really talk about what I liked the most about this film without getting into some heavy duty spoilers, so take this opportunity to stop and bookmark this review until you’ve seen the film if you have to!
It Ends With Us does check a lot of the romance boxes – young love, the magic of a chance encounter, wealthy hard-to-let-their-guard down men, the quirky best friend, the overbearing father. These elements of the story and characters allow the film to fit firmly in there with the romance genre. If you like those movies, this film fits seamlessly in next to them. It’s a little more well-acted, though. There are some over-the-top dramatic moments, but for the most part, Blake Lively and the cast kept things down to Earth. I do wonder what the over/under was on the number of times Lively’s character was written to bite her lip. Anyway, it has its fair share of cheesy dialogue, but at times, the script really shines, cutting down on some of the cheese that typically permeates these types of films.
It’s where the film travels into the themes of generational trauma, domestic abuse, and the decisions that women in such situations are faced with that set it apart in the genre with the message that it sends. At times, there is a tonal disconnect between the execution of this film and the heavy subject matter it tries to take on. You get the sense watching it that the book does take more time to explore the depths of it, but even with a two-hour-plus run time, it’s hard for the gravity of what’s happening to really sink in. If you’re not a novel reader, I’d imagine you’ll have to do some of the work on your own. But, at times, we’re laughing at something silly when moments later, we have a pit in our stomach. The film doesn’t necessarily translate seamlessly between the two, but it’s a commendable effort to get the point across.
It is a little too on-the-nose, with the film being titled It Ends With Us and the first thing we see from Ryle is him flipping a chair and grunting in anger. Later in the conversation, he mentions that he knows the boy who killed his brother is going to be traumatized for life. Right away, I’m like “ah, there’s something to this cat I don’t like.” The moments of abuse being portrayed as vague instances open to interpretation seemed purposeful…as if to show us that in these horrible moments, we can’t always see clearly, and we have a tendency to believe what we want to believe. If you could see what was coming in this plot, it made it painful to watch. Ultimately, it’s pretty clever and tight writing that sews up nicely. Little nuggets sprinkled throughout the film paid off once we got to where we were going.
But, there were two concepts that the film touched on that I was truly impressed with. For one, throughout history, media has had a way of portraying abusers as a stereotype. They’re miserable men who drink too much, or arrogant sociopaths who believe they can do whatever they want. That sort of thing. But, this film does a good job of portraying an abuser that’s actually a lot closer to reality – abusers can be anyone, even successful neurosurgeons. It doesn’t even have to be an inherently evil person. It can be someone you love letting things go too far. It can be the person you never see it coming from. And, it doesn’t have to be some pattern of years-long behavior to be abuse. One instance is unacceptable. So, I felt like Justin Baldoni put forth a good effort to show that normal people in everyday life can be abusers just as much as the bitter old men.
I also liked how the story played with the concept of generational trauma – on one hand, Lilly is making peace with her parents’ relationship and has learned from it. On the other, Ryle has let his trauma consume him. Look what each has become. Lilly is emboldened, liberated even, and strengthened by the end of the film. Ryle is crushed. There is a strong message of processing your trauma in there because we see how it can effect the ones you love if you don’t. Ultimately, I was taken aback by how much I enjoyed this movie. I mean, I don’t think I’ll be going out of my way to catch too many romance flicks, but I’d say it’s a solid addition to the genre. The subject matter can be uncomfortable at times, but It Ends With Us is a tightly written story about ending generational trauma and the liberation that comes with it. Yes, even I, a grown ass 38 year old man, cried during the hospital scene. 2.5/5.
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Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD, #BeBetter, and ‘Minds right, asses tight.’ “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, Yankee Candle, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley.
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