Let’s face it – every day we are routinely bombarded with questions. When you’re an emerging media company in Nashville, people just want to know what your opinions are on everything. It’s only natural. And, since our duty is to serve the people, well, we have no choice but to be present. That’s the SoBro Way. Also, aren’t mailbags just a barrel of laughs anyway? Welcome to the newest weekly recurring feature up in this bitch: The SoBros Mailbag. As always, hit us with those mailbag questions @SoBrosNetwork on Twitter, email ’em to me anonymously at thesobrosnetwork@gmail.com. And, holy shit, I need to update this terrible intro paragraph that I’ve been using literally ever since I started writing this column…
This edition of the SoBros Mailbag is brought to you by Memo’s Mexican Kitchen in Mount Juliet, Tennessee! Memo’s offers a fresh, modern take on the Mexican restaurant just a mile north of I-40 off of the Mount Juliet exit. For my money, they cook up the best quesabirria in town! Check out the full menu on their website and let ’em know SoBros Network sent you.
Question:
What is your favorite film by Martin Scorsese and Favorite film by Steven Soderbergh?
— Titan Travis (@Titantravis08) August 15, 2024
Answer:
The Soderbergh question doesn’t feel fair because I haven’t seen some of his more critically acclaimed stuff, so it feels like a cop out, but I’m going Ocean’s Eleven. Though, I’d say he had a really cool flick a couple of years ago that I felt slipped through the cracks that year, No Sudden Move. I’ve seen much more of Scorsese, but that’s pretty easily The Departed…that one is probably on my top five favorite movies I’ve ever seen.
Question:
Fill out this "By season's end" ballot for the Titans
— Football & Other F Words (@FWordsPod) August 15, 2024
Rushing Leader:
Receiving Leader:
Most TE Snaps:
Sack Leader:
Interception Leader:
LB Duo at the End:
Answer:
Rushing Leader: Tyjae Spears
Receiving Leader: Calvin Ridley (yards), Tyler Boyd (receptions)
Most TE Snaps: Josh Whyle
Sack Leader: Jeffery Simmons
Interception Leader: Roger McCreary
LB Duo at the End: Kenneth Murray and Jack Gibbens
Question:
If your perfume scent was built around a condiment, what would it be and what other scent notes would you have to go with it? Also, what would you call it?
— Football & Other F Words (@FWordsPod) August 15, 2024
Answer:
100% barbecue sauce – I already think barbecue sauce smells good enough to wear as cologne…something nice, sweet, and smoky. I’d maybe add some cayenne to it to sting the nostrils a bit. We’re calling it “Aromatic Sweat No. 1.”
Question:
In an era of movie remakes (many of which are actively bad and some of which felt completely unnecessary) what is a movie or movie series you're surprised *hasn't* been remade and, if it's a different answer, what would you like to see remade?
— Jamal (@Jamalisms) August 15, 2024
Answer:
Jamal, I just watched Commando for the first time and immediately said, “they need to remake this with the entire Skarsgard clan.” So, that’s what comes to mind right away. A year ago, I would’ve said I was surprised they haven’t touched The Crow, but speaking of Skarsgards…well, here we are. With the family aspect of it and as popular as it was, I’m surprised there hasn’t been a reboot of The Goonies…or The Sandlot for that matter. Personally, I wouldn’t want it, but it’s all about the cash grab these days.
Question:
Alternate question based on my current life circumstance:
— Jamal (@Jamalisms) August 15, 2024
Is there a food that has a greater drop-off in overall ability to satisfy once it gets cold … than scrambled eggs?
Answer:
Scrambled eggs is 100% the right answer here. I can’t think of anything that is even remotely close in terms of the drop-off once it’s cold.
Question:
There are two pills. 1. reverses your life and now you are in 2004 at that age you keep all previous knowledge . 2. This pill instantly puts $10 million into your bank account.
— Titan Travis (@Titantravis08) August 15, 2024
Answer:
I’m taking the first pill, saving my money, and investing it in things I know will pan out. Imagine getting in on Bitcoin when it was like $2. Easy – I’m going to make way more than that $10M. Also, I’m going to be hitting some crazy parlays once I hit that part in the timeline where sports betting becomes legal in Tennessee.
Question:
What's a talent or skill you wish you possessed?
— Canadian Titan (@Canadian_Titan) August 15, 2024
Answer:
Man, I love music so fucking much, but I can’t sing for shit. If I could actually sing, I might have never gotten into writing. I’d probably be somewhere in a band trying to make it as a musician.
Question:
What’s a hobby that you think is cool but probably won’t ever get into?
— Artist Formerly Known as Derrick Henry’s Stiff Arm (@traviebird00) August 15, 2024
Answer:
Man, I really want to get into gardening. It’s so peaceful when I go out and water our pepper plants (after my wife forgot to). But, I’m kind of at my limit with hobbies. If I ever get to write/podcast for a living and don’t have to work a day job 8 hours a day, it’ll probably be the first thing I really get into.
Question:
In your opinion, which NFL Head Coach is irritable as a bad case of hemorrhoids?
— Ed Helinski 🇺🇸🇵🇱 (@MrEd315) August 15, 2024
Answer:
I don’t know why, but I can’t stand Mike McCarthy – something about the way the game has clearly passed him by but he’s still hanging on based on a reputation that I’m not sure is deserving anymore.
Question:
Do you want to smell like Mayo?
— Dan Scraggins (@danscrog) August 15, 2024
Answer:
Not really, Dan. No.
Question:
Would it be possible to write a Haiku about Jake Bobos joint practice performance
— JT Ruhnke (@jt_ruhnke) August 15, 2024
Answer:
4.99 speed
with hands like the sturdy oak
high above Roger
Keep the questions coming – catch y’all next week!
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network, and a Dogs Playing Poker on velvet connoisseur. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD, #BeBetter, and ‘Minds right, asses tight.’ “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, Yankee Candle, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley.
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