The Swingers Have Officially Moved Their Sexy Slumber Party Away From Nashville

Is NOTHING sacred, covid?!?!

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Is nothing sacred anymore, covid? Can you not let us have one simple pleasure anymore? As if taking our jobs and livelihoods wasn’t enough, you had to go and take away our sexy slumber party at the Comfort Inn and Suites in Antioch?

Oh shit – gotta be careful. This sexy slumber party was supposed to be held at an unnamed hotel in Nashville, but for the past couple of years, it was held at the Comfort Inn and Suites in Antioch. I was just assuming and boy can you not just assume shit in this journalism game. That’s a surefire way to get in hot water, so let me be sure I’ve back-tracked effectively on that one.

The point is that Nashville isn’t going to get it’s big swinger fuck party this year and covid is 100% to blame.

Courtesy of WSMV:

A controversial private party that allegedly caters to swingers will not be held in Nashville in December. The Vibe Social Club is moving its weekend-long party to Mississippi, according to a post on the members-only Vibe site that was shared with News 4. The Vibe described its Christmas party as “a sexy slumber party,” suggesting guests wear a “fuzzy warm robe over some sexy lingerie to be unwrapped.”

DAMN IT! Not the Vibe Social Club! To quote Goofy, “gorsh!” I was really hoping to deliver some good news to you guys on this fine Friday morning. I always try to put some light content up to get you guys vibing just right…y’know….like the Vibe Social Club. Fridays are all about gettin’ you guys ready for wife swaps and group sex. That’s our mission here at the SoBros Network.

But, that mission has come to a screeching halt on this Friday. It’s a huge bummer.

What are we going to do now, Nashville? It’s not like we can put on our lingerie and fuzzy robes and unwrap them ourselves on a Zoom call. That’s not the holiday spirit. I’m not putting on my lingerie unless a complete stranger that I met a hotel sex party is taking it off. Those are just the rules when it comes to this group sex swinger lifestyle. I didn’t write ’em. Don’t hate the player. Hate the game.

They’re moving this thing to Mississippi. Now, I’m no scientist, but I think that’s an indicator that covid must not exist in Mississippi. But, I don’t know if I can justify that drive. I mean, that’s like….four hours? Driving in a robe and lingerie? That sounds like it’s way too uncomfortable, and the risk-reward measurement, considering the group sex with strangers at a hotel, I don’t know if it’s worth it.

Plus, I’d be willing to bet that covid ain’t the worst thing you’re gonna catch at a party like this.

So, I don’t know – maybe I’ll just disrobe at the Walmart and call it a day.

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Nashville, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley

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